What do you no longer believe?

Ramit Sethi

Here’s an interesting question — a great icebreaker, provocative interview question, and overall great thought piece.

“What do you no longer believe?”

I’m curious to know what you think.

My responses:

  1. I don’t believe intelligence is the most important value. I used to think intelligence was king. Not anymore. Now I believe social skills, kindness, generosity, and humor are at least as important. I met a guy with absolutely zero sense of humor last week and I wanted to bash my head through a brick wall. The first thing he said wa– never mind. You get it.
  2. I don’t believe if you put the time in, you can be good at anything. Sorta provocative for a guy in self-development to say. But I now know there are certain things I’ll never be good at (like navigation or puzzles). But I also believe most people give up way, way too soon.
  3. I don’t believe that I truly understand myself. At 22, I used to be so sure of the things I liked and didn’t like. I was also sure I was a tech guy, a skinny Indian guy, and someone who didn’t really like fish. At 34, I’m completely different. I wonder what will happen by 40.

What do you not believe any more?

Leave your comment below (and check out what others said). Super interesting.

P.S. I asked my team what they thought. Here are some of their answers:

  • “I don’t believe that you should always follow your dreams. Some dreams are bad dreams. Not everyone should be an astronaut.”
  • “I no longer believe luck is random — a lot of it depends on preparation and recognition of the opportunities ‘luck’ creates.”
  • “I don’t believe that a college degree is the only path to success.”
  • “I don’t believe that my mother will ever understand what I do for a living.”
  • “I can’t give my answers publicly.”

See all the other comments below.

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  1. Christiane

    I no longer believe that being an introvert means I have to live passively. I am an introvert and that’s not only cool, it also helps me reach my goals. I’m an Ambitious Introvert!

    • Krystian Fiedoruk

      An Ambitious Introvert! Well said!

    • Stacy

      Two thumbs up to Christiane’s comment…..Quiet Leadership is not an oxymoron.

    • Barbie

      I no longer believe in perfection. I’ll never be perfect, and my projects will never be prefect, and that’s okay. I’ve learned to appreciate fully what’s good about me and what I do, without giving the flaws another thought.

  2. Kash

    I no longer believe that people cannot change. You can choose who you want to be – for better or worse – and by practicing a behavior, it becomes a habit. Habits become …

    • Iesha A Adeyemi

      I don’t believe that no matter how hard I try I won’t ever succeed.

      I don’t believe that I will always be a failure.

      I don’t believe that I will always stop something that I start.

    • Tuula

      I also no longer believe that people don’t change. For a long time, I took for granted the belief that “people don’t change with age; they just become more of the same”. Now that I am older, I can see change (to both directions) in people around me as well as in myself. I now believe that change is related to personality: some people embrace new things and change, others fear and resist anything unknown. I have also watched someone close to me, who used to resist all new things, grow into a curious explorer who is open-minded to new experiences. Perhaps also being born with either “glass half full” or “glass half empty” influences one’s ability to change. On the other hand, a pessimist who marries an optimist seems to have a decent chance of learning to be optimistic and embrace change. In my experience, the reverse is less likely: optimists seem to be more resilient than pessimists and will maintain their positive outlook even living among resisters.

    • Krystian Fiedoruk

      My thoughts exactly! I also used to believe, that people are who they are and always be the same… WRONG!

      With the right mindset and work done we can become anything we want…

  3. D'Angelo

    As a 30-year-old engineer, I no longer believe that my soft skills can’t be just as remarkable and profitable.

    • Stuart

      As a 31-year-old content marketer, I no longer believe that my hard skills are the only thing remarkable and profitable.

  4. Donald Wheeler

    I no longer believe that encouraging my children to attend post-secondary education is going to help them in any way. Makes me sad as I enjoyed university but I don’t think that the ROI is even remotely the same anymore …

    • Marilyn

      You stated my feelings and opinion about this so well. So much has changed.

  5. stax

    “I can’t give my answers publicly.”


    • Julie

      If that’s the case, why even bother commenting?

  6. Chris Horner

    I don’t believe that college is the be all end all important goal to set someone up for life. I also no longer believe that home ownership is the only path to financial freedom. I don’t believe someone has to stay stuck in the same career field just because it’s what they’ve done. Change can happen. Life can be lived on your terms. Not what marketing and media tell you.

  7. Kate

    I no longer believe in everyone’s potential. This is a harsh reality for me, especially as a teacher and coach…I always see potential, but now I recognize that not everyone is interested in the hard work of building their capacity. Now I’m Missouri-the “show me” state. Words are fun but your choices prove who you really are.

    • Julie

      Yes! Potential is great, but so many people waste it because they are unwilling to put in the amount of time and effort it takes to develop it into mastery.

  8. Carolynn

    I used to think the purpose of life was finding happiness, which was always this nebulous state of perfection and perpetual bliss.

    Now I realize “happiness”, for me, comes from personal growth and making an impact. And you know what? That stuff often pisses me off. I’m rarely comfortable, frequently frustrated. I VASTLY underestimated how long it takes to get good at something and how brutal the climb to excellence is.

    Oh, and as you move up, your problems don’t go away, they just change. In some respects, they become harder.

    I feel fulfilled and I enjoy what I do, so I consider myself happy. But boy, my definition of “happy” sure changed.

    • Christine

      Hear hear! You took the words right out of my mouth.

    • Susie G

      Excellent response. I agree!

    • Isabella

      Yes! Especially when they tell you that humans were made for happiness. It fooled me into thinking that when I will achieve my goals then I will have all the feelings of “happiness.” I’m also not an emotional person on the outside like some people I know. They trick me into thinking that they are happy because they have all those feelings. I’m glad I saw your post now at age 23.

    • Julie

      Well said! I feel very much the same way. I used to equate ‘happy’ with ‘comfortable’…and the irony is, I was utterly miserable then. Now I find more happiness than I could have imagined by challenging myself to grow – which inevitably means leaving my comfort zone. Could it be that comfortable is the enemy of happy?

  9. Jennifer

    I don’t believe that a college degree is always important — you should be able to justify the investment otherwise it’s likely not worth it. I don’t believe that I just need to keep giving endlessly to eventually get support from others… sometimes you’ve got to stop being so darn passive and be bold enough to ask for what you want.

  10. Kevin

    That news reporters have ethics and a “code” that ensures they always strive to tell “the truth” of both sides of a story.

    • Susie

      Was just pondering the exact same thing! I used to believe that they had a standard to tell the truth and tell it factually. It is certainly not true! I believed in lies for so long and now I feel far more liberated.

    • Adrienne Baumann

      Sadly, I believe you are correct, Kevin. I now believe that ratings/revenue are the primary goal of news outlets…

  11. Cass

    I don’t believe in “success formulas” it’s a red flag whenever I see it now. I look at coaches now like I would a field guide on a hike. A good guide knows that you can know the terrain but you have to be nimble and prepared for different elements. If you can’t be a resource in the hardest parts than what you have is *one* success path – not a formula.

    Also I don’t believe there’s one path to success.

  12. Dave

    I no longer believe that I want to be in a management role. Too many of my management roles required me to judge people in ways I had trouble supporting. I can assess progress against goals and the success of projects, but being judgemental about the person feels wrong. I’ve had a few short roles as an individual contributor and was much happier.

  13. Matthew

    I no longer believe the world is as black and white as I did when I was younger.

    I no longer believe that any individual is purely “evil”.

    I no longer believe that I have to be a doctor and go into medical practice.

  14. Nate

    I no longer believe that I always know exactly what I want before I set a goal. The old maxim “Be careful what you wish for…you just might get it” exists for a reason. Adjusting expectations as you learn is important, as is recognizing when following the path you set out for yourself no longer leads to a place you want to go.

    • Kendra

      I resonate with this – I feel like it is hard to envision what I want my life to look like in 10 or 20 years because I have learned so much that has shifted my perspectives and my interests have changed so much in just the past 2 years.

    • Julie

      I completely agree with this. I feel pressured to set long-term goals, but I have a hard time doing so with real sincerity, because my perspectives, interests, and beliefs are often changing.

  15. Matt

    It was never like a religion to me, but I no longer give much credit to astrology and similar beliefs. When people want to blame nearly everything that goes wrong on “Mercury retrograde,” it drives me nuts. It just seems to be a way of denying responsibility. “It’s not my fault, I’m a Pisces, I can’t help being this way.”

    Of course people tell me that my being a Taurus is why I don’t believe.

    • Marilyn


    • Susie

      Exactly. It is just another case of excuses and endorsing victim mentality. What a load of bollocks to think because mercury is retrograde that it didn’t work out. You and me are all greater than our external circumstances. A complete and total lack of responsibly and accountability, not to mention integrity.

    • Julie

      Fellow Taurus here 🙂
      I agree 100% with taking personal responsibility for what happens. In the end it’s up to us – which is an empowering thing to believe.
      However (and I may catch some flak for this), I do believe astrology can give us an insight into our natural tendencies, and what challenges we might be facing during a certain time. Having that understanding into why we might feel a certain way or have to deal with a certain set of issues can be helpful.
      You’re absolutely right that too many people use that as an excuse. Instead I try to use it as a tool: “OK, this is what I’m dealing with,” and then actually deal with it! All things can be overcome. It’s important to make the effort.

  16. Dorita

    I no longer believe your have to Hustle (aka term for killing yourself with so much work that you don’t have fun or are no fun and ate miserable) to succeed in life.

  17. Wendy Reese

    I no longer believe my vote counts in the US (which pisses me off) but I do believe my actions and spending count as a vote.
    I no longer believe I know. Meaning, the more I know, the more I know I don’t know!
    I no longer believe things happen TO me- I know I am responsible for my actions and reactions, even on a subconscious level.
    I no longer believe I am immortal, or for that matter want to die. I know life, even with all its challenges, is pretty effing awesome!


    1. I no longer believe that parents should impose or choose careers for their children cos all children have their on potentials and abilities.

    2. I no longer believe that hard work bring riches.

  19. Ann Mehrman

    I don’t believe that I will leave an important legacy and I will need to find a way to appreciate and find value in what I do each day. Things are not as important as the relationships and experiences we have with the people we meet along the way.

    • James

      This is so true, Ann. One of the biggest disservices we do to kids is to teach each and every one of them that they are special — this creates unrealistic expectations. The worst advice I ever got was when my high school counselor told me, “When you find your passion, you’re going to be able to achieve anything you want.” That put me in an arrogant mindset of feeling like I was going to one day be someone famous or notable, when by definition, most of us need to be near the middle of the bell curve.

      When I finally realized that I’m not so special, I also came to the conclusion that what matters most in my life are the connections I have with other people. There’s a great short story that you can read online, “Mono No Aware,” that teaches this lesson quite beautifully: We are defined by the places we hold in the web of others’ lives.

  20. David

    I no longer believe that divorce is unacceptable in all circumstances.

    I grew up in a conservative Christian household that taught that divorce was completely unacceptable. I still hold fast to my faith, but I take a broader view of this matter now.

    Speaking of murder, Jesus taught that anybody filled with excessive anger toward another person was guilty of murder. Speaking of adultery, Jesus taught that anybody filled with lust for another person was guilty of adultery. Shouldn’t similar reasoning be applied to marriage? Can somebody emotionally abandon their spouse while remaining legally married? If so, would a legal divorce do any further damage?

    To be clear, divorce is still a bad thing to be avoided. But I fully recognize that it sometimes is the best course of action.

    • Julie

      Getting divorced was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I’m 1000x happier, and my son’s father and I get along better now than we ever have.

  21. Simon

    I longer believe the traditional western education can really prepare Your for a career. Things are just moving too fast and schools are pretty static and hard to change. I say this as a long time student and as i teacher at university…

  22. Jenn

    I no longer believe that stay at home moms of school-agers have all the time they want.

    I no longer believe in unconditional love. Some people have a hard time loving what they don’t understand.

    I no longer believe that rich people suck. They have different priorities, and that can be a beautiful thing.

  23. Miguel Gomez

    I no longer believe in religion. It has a place for some people, for sure, but not for me.
    I no longer believe that “lots of work”=success, you need to be smart about the type of work you do.
    I no longer believe that you need to be “old” (or at least, “older”) to be successful, that was a way for me to postpone a lot of things.
    I no longer believe that the brand of your clothes or the type of car you drive or even the size of your house are a measure of how wealthy you are, now I see those things as a reflection of one’s values.

  24. Sudharsan

    I don’t believe we are the product of our past but a brand of the future which needs to be constructed, broken, improve and rebuild till the end.

  25. Connor

    I no longer believe that I am an introvert, or that being either introverted or extroverted is inherently ‘better’. I set introversion on a pedestal and looked down on extroverts. Only last year did I finally go to counselling and after tweaking this one thing in my mind, I am much happier and am finding much more social and academic success.

    Also, I no longer believe that university is entirely terrible and useless. I have been forced to recognize that education has value, *even when* the structures which facilitate it are horrible and inefficient.

  26. Karan

    I no longer believe that something like god even exists.
    It’s something that people have created for themselves and for young ones to use when they are deprived of any answer.
    The excuse of “god” comes to their rescue when they fail to come out with a reason.

    I no longer believe that elders are always right in taking decisions and deciding fate of their children.

    I no longer believe opposites attract.
    Or maybe I should say – opposites do attract but rarely stay together.

    • Russell

      I no longer believe that “god” and religion are pure bologna whose sole purpose is to keep people dumb and anaesthetized – I’ve come to view them as a technology useful for passing down ideas and practices across generations and across languages.
      The supernatural and faith aspects of it are still silly to me, but now I see that many religious practices, like ritual, diet and meditation are indeed inherently beneficial to a human life.
      Now if we could just get rid of the bigotry and intolerance…

  27. Karen

    I no longer believe I have time to do everything I want to do. As I’ve gotten older, I feel I have to make some hard decisions regarding how to spend my time and energy.

  28. Robert Putt

    Clothing, hair and grooming presentation don’t matter…..wrong. I think that impact first impression incredibly and can alter people’s preservative of everything you say.

  29. Amit Bhagat

    1. I no longer believe that I can work a 9-5 job for the next 40 years of my life.

    2. I no longer believe that job titles or promotions have a direct relationship with the competence of the individual in that role.

    3. I no longer believe that older and more conventional business people and entrepreneurs have more valuable knowledge and opinions than I do about running a business in today’s world.

  30. Alex

    I no longer believe that happiness is the main goal in life. The problem is that if you focus too much on happiness, you might get caught up in chasing immediate gratification, seeking the biggest thrills, at the expense of your future. There must be a balance somewhere. There must be an optimal solution, where you don’t have to sacrifice your future for short-term happiness. I guess as long as you remember to define happiness as “short-term pleasure plus long-term fulfillment”, then you should be fine.

    Incidentally, this is in line with Stoic philosophy, which says that struggle and discomfort is an integral part of mental well-being and a balanced life.

  31. Mike H.

    I no longer believe that a 850 Credit Score is a good thing so I can continue to buy useless shit to impress people I don’t even know and who couldn’t care less anyways.

    I no longer believe I have to stay in a unfulfilling job until I turn 70 years old to retire. I can make it happen MUCH earlier and it is all up to me!!

    • Alexandra

      I no longer believe in the rewards that might come with following the Big Rules that I was raised with. lt seems super-obvious when I type it out, but I was raised to think that if I was obedient and followed the script that’d been laid out for me by my family and society, I’d reap certain rewards. First, the rewards didn’t come and secondly, I hated that life anyways.

  32. Barbara

    I will never be a whistle blower again
    In the 90s there was a situation involving 2 co-workers involved in something that was a conflict of interest and a compromise to safety. I told my manager. There was an investigation and they were fired (which I did not expect and which I did not want to see happen).
    For years I had my life threatened and was treated poorly. It was a nightmare

    I work at a different company now and they have “if you see something, say something” posters. If I see something I am not saying one word unless it involves someone committing an act of violence.

    BTW I work for a major airline in the USA.

    • Julie

      I had a similar experience in a restaurant job. I thought by speaking out about the corruption I witnessed, things would get better and the higher-ups would care. Boy was I wrong. What a miserable time in my life.

  33. Wayne

    I no longer believe that true selflessness exists. Once upon a time I used to believe that people could act altruistically. Now I believe that there is value obtained and a reward received (or negative outcome avoided) for each and every one of our actions.

  34. Jonathan Alexander

    As someone who made a pretty substantial change to my personality, I no longer believe personality is immutable (and research backs that up). I don’t think everyone can change a ton, but I think nearly everyone is capable to some degree.

  35. Susan

    I no longer believe that medicine is a science. At best, it is an art in its infancy.

    I no longer believe that formal education is structured to maximize learning. The ancient Greeks came much closer to getting it right for the young. Of course, youth should only be the introduction to learning, which should be practiced ever thereafter.

    I no longer believe that with age comes wisdom. I’ve met too many fools my own age (retirement).

    • Danielle

      That last one. HA made me laugh. YES every age group has those people who I charitably call “uninformed” and unwilling to become informed.

  36. Shayne

    Great question, Ramit!

    I no longer believe anyone is right, except Soren Kierkegaard. He was right when he said, “Truth is Subjectivity.”

    I also no longer believe Kierkegaard was right about labels. When you label me, you negate yourself.

    Not you specifically, Ramit. The labelers. The labelers, enablers and Kenny Stabler. (That was the only rhyme I could think of.)

  37. Musa

    I don’t believe in “the right path” anymore. I always worried about making “the right decision” and choosing the right life path. I realised much later that life isn’t about choosing a path that you walk down forever. Each moment brings choices that will eventually add up.

    Besides, each path may be different, but I think there can be multiple “right paths” for every person, not one path to success and a million roads to failure.

  38. Colin Sievers

    I no longer believe that being an adult or older just automatically makes you right. Entering the work place, I realized that adults have the same problems as children, if they never were able to make habitual changes.

  39. Matt Karamazov

    I no longer believe that it’s in society’s best interest for every guy to be good with women.

    • Erika

      Maybe it’s in society’s best interest for every guy to be good with people?

  40. Amit

    I no longer believe that buying and accumulating materialistic possession makes me happier. I also no longer believe that making more money will make me happier.

  41. Just another indian male

    I no longer believe I am unattractive, without confidence, or without power simply because I lived the “goody two-shoes” life. My power comes from within, and I choose who to give it to.

  42. Felipe

    I no longer believe that I should try to change the world. It’s not my to change and who says my opinion of what’s good is better than anyone else’s?

  43. Christopher Ferrell

    I don’t believe in fate. I believe the opportunities you expose yourself and work habits determine your destiny.

  44. Chris

    I no longer believe I have nearly as much control over life as I once did.

    I no longer believe I know what I want to do with the remainining life I have left.

  45. Stuart

    That I’m unable to choose for myself my interests and passions and work, that I just exist to “provide value” to businesses at the cost of my own talents and direction, and that I don’t deserve to be paid equal to my peers because “it’s just not in our budget”.

  46. Stefany

    I no longer believe that being as independent as possible means doing everything bu yourself. I now ask for help whenever needed and of course give as much as i can. I’m also working on improving my social skills and i think i’m doing a pretty good job. While I enjoy being a quite introvert I also see the benefit in spending times with other human beings and learn from them.

  47. Matt

    I no longer believe a career in one place will lead to success. I used to think I had to be dependent on a large company to provide me with a big salary and pension, but now I believe that at some point I need to be my own boss instead of being dependent on someone else.

  48. austin

    I no longer believe all the bullshit excuses I used to tell myself about why my dreams weren’t coming true. I didn’t know what it truly meant to want something bad enough to actually work at it. I didn’t know what work was!

  49. Carmen

    “I can’t give my answers publicly.”

    Now these are the answers I REALLY want to hear…

  50. Carmen

    I no longer believe weight loss is strictly calories in, calories out.

    I no longer believe that hard work equals 100% success.

    I no longer believe being a good girl gets you more respect.

  51. Lindsay

    I no longer believe that I have to have it all figured out before I start.

    I no longer believe that my health cannot change.

    I no longer believe that our government has our best interests at heart.

    I no longer believe that school is as important as I used to think.

    I no longer believe that other people have everything figured out.

  52. Val

    I no longer believe that parenthood, marriage, or even and companionship are necessary attributes of a happy life. Some people are better off on their own.

  53. Christine

    I no longer believe that only some people have blind spots. We are all blind to our blindness :). When we have biased and habitual thinking (which is what our brains are designed to do: automate and protect),it can lead to blind spots, imho.

    • James

      I totally agree, Christine. By definition, blind spots cannot be seen.

      Search YouTube for a video series called “The Power of Belief.” While I don’t like the author’s agenda (he’s basically telling people who follow a religion that they’re being taken advantage of via their blind spots), the cited psychology experiments that describe the various ways our brains fail us is fascinating.

  54. Prashant Y.S.R

    1. I do not believe that 10’th, 11’th & 12’th standards/grades are the most crucial years/phases of ones life.

    2. I do not believe that one settles down in life after marriage.

    3. I do not believe that one should finish ones education/studies by 25, get married by 27-28, have kid(s) by 30 and be a grandfather/grandmother by 60.

  55. Laura

    I no longer believe that as a woman, I will have the same professional opportunities and success as men with comperable talents/knowledge/work ethic. This doesn’t mean I cannot achieve great success, but that separate, unequal roads remain.

  56. James

    I no longer believe that hard work and smarts are the most important elements for ensuring a good life — luck, good and bad, trumps everything.

    The main factors for success — e.g., what family you were born into, what kind of brain you were born with, and even your ability to work hard — are handed out to us in random quantities. Yes, you can guarantee failure through poor judgment, but dumb luck decides whether we are given the ingredients to succeed. And even when we are given those ingredients, random bolts of lightning (e.g., cancer, car accident, and literal lightning bolts) can wipe out all of that good luck in an instant.

    Don’t get me wrong. We should work hard, we should treat others well, and we should do everything we can to succeed. My point is that the best we can do is to optimally play the poker hand of life that we’re dealt. I used to think that I earned my good life, but now I just feel very lucky.

  57. Sri

    I no longer believe in talent alone. Good communication skills and listening are the ones making this world spin.

  58. vero halo

    I don’t beleive in perfection anymore
    i don’t pursue it and don’t expect it feo. others
    we are all human

  59. Carlos Tinoco

    I no longer believe that having always the reason is the path to be happy or successful. I think it is extremely important to learn to understand every stimulus and criticism to turn it into a good input for your life and projects.

  60. Allan Irwin

    After loving my wife & family unconditionally for 17 years,I no longer believe in being able to count on any person for help or support. I gave of all of my resources ,efforts in labor & emotions to my family members happiness. When I became laid up with a bad hip & in need of surgery, I was abandoned by all of them. My wife cheated behind my back,followed by her moving away with her new man,having our dog sent away & put down & took all our money from the bank as well. I was cast out on to the street with no resources,lost everyone I loved most,my home & all the wonderful things I created over the years too. I only place my faith & trust in God or animals now. Don’t ever depend on a person for anything. I do hope & pray also that Karma is an existing form of universal justice,that gives back to people what they give out to others too.

  61. Carmen

    “I don’t believe intelligence is the most important value.”

    This is something I wish the miserable, self loathing but highly cocky crowd at Reddit would learn.

    So much “intelligence” but so much loser attitude!

  62. Adam

    I no longer believe that the creator of the universe wrote a book. After 32 years in fundamentalism, I studied myself out of it and changed my mind.

    I no longer believe that all non-Christians are going to hell because I no longer believe there is a hell.

    I no longer believe that I should wait on a supernatural being to improve my life — I can only improve my life by taking action! I alone am responsible for my success and fulfillment.

  63. Emily

    I no longer believe that opportunities are granted. Instead, you need to chase them down.

  64. Zukile

    I do believe in Love,But I don’t believe you can be loved by everyone.Am a Coffee Specialist Technician by profession ,Hey people talk bad things about the Machines and the person who’s fixing them,and remember you haven’t done anything wrong at that time.

  65. Steve from Arkansas

    I used to believe I would work full time until past 65. But when I hit 60 I realized that I wasn’t having as much fun at work as I used to and that since I was financially independent it didn’t make sense to work extremely hard at something I had stopped enjoying. It was a great decision. I’m working four side gigs now, about 20 hours per week, making more money than I need, since I don’t need any, and really enjoying both the side gigs and the extra recreation time.

  66. Mimi

    I no longer believe that there is any one force in the universe that determines how a life is lived and what the outcomes are. The Universe/God(s), nature, culture, free-will, society, psychology, faith, actions and behaviors all converge. Destiny and quality of life are a perpetual push-and-pull of all of these things, so better learn about all of them and how to help myself and others live a better life!

  67. Sam

    I no longer believe in the low ceilings I put over myself; the idea that I am too lazy and scatterbrained to run a successful business. Instead, I am learning to adapt. I am learning that by implementing small daily habits, I can drastically improve my productivity and general quality of life.

  68. Rusty

    I don’t believe that being an artist requires you to be an expert or a fan of the art of your peers.

  69. John Fawkes

    My number one would also be the intelligence thing- and I think society systematically overvalues intelligence. There was a mind-blowing article about that on The Atlantic last year.

    I no longer believe that money and economics are the only things that drive all the big political events in the world. Other things like security and collective ego matter too.

    I no longer have much trust in doctors. They know more than I do overall, but since most of it is half-remembered from when they went to school, I believe it’s actually pretty easy to know more about your own medical condition than a doctor does.

    I no longer believe that all beliefs should be separated strictly into right and wrong, or true and false. In many cases I think it’s better to treat beliefs as mental models with degrees of factual correctness that lend them a certain utility. I also think that knowledge is inherently probabilistic in nature, and the smartest way to answer a tough question is generally by assigning probabilities to multiple possible answers.

  70. Heather

    I no longer believe that anyone is truly “self-made.” Everyone’s success is influenced by external factors, even if they seem invisible to us. Not just parents and teachers who open doors and smooth the way for us, but systemic influences: the particular corner of society that we live in that influences what our options are (and what we think our options are). When I was younger (well, college-age), I was convinced I’d gotten where I was based on my own hard work alone.

  71. Dan

    I no longer believe that I need to define success by anyone’s standards but my own.

  72. Frost

    I no longer believe that I have to just love only one person.

  73. Rosie

    First thing that came to my mind was .. I no longer believe in Santa.

    But on a personal note I no longer believe that a 9 > 5 job will ever make my soul sing. Here’s to new adventures and possibilities.

    • Julia Patek

      Bravo! Enjoy the trip! 🙂

  74. Wesselztl

    I no longer believe that there is some secret thing I need to be successful

  75. Paula

    I stopped believing that I can change others, even if they’re not ready to change. The reality is that the only one you can change is yourself.

  76. Christina

    My value is not diminished by others failing to recognize my worth

    • Julia Patek

      Excellent insight!

      I also realized I did not need anyone’s permission or approval in order for me to succeed!

  77. Shelby

    I no longer believe that time equals money. Time has far greater value than money, and if you must choose between freedom (options on how to spend your limited and precious time) and money, always, always, always choose freedom (i.e. time).

  78. Gustavo

    I no longer believe that humility and ambition are separate things.

    Humility and ambition can only co-exist together. A humble person recognizes their greatness. Humility is almost a proxy for just knowing.

  79. Julia Patek

    I don’t believe poverty is as big a problem to solve as I once did. I believe that with the amount of abundance as there is in this world that poverty could be solved right this minute. The biggest question is how and answer in not all about money being the answer.

  80. Christine Feaster

    I no longer believe that people who are materially rich are morally bankrupt, and by the same token I no longer believe becoming successful will corrupt my morals and values.

    I no longer believe that successful people are geniuses who know some secret that I don’t. They’re tenacious, resourceful, and persistent – and there’s still some degree of luck involved.

    I no longer believe all the good ideas are taken – or that the idea matters that much. Google entered the search index market when it was already dominated by three giants. Apple’s iPod was released years after the Archos which could already play music and videos and fit in your pocket. Execution is everything.

    • Danielle


    • Fiona

      With you on that!

  81. Irene

    I no longer believe in God in the traditional sense… Instead I believe that we are all connected and part of a universal consciousness, like grain of sands on the beach or drops of water in the Ocean, as such we can all influence eachother and create big positive changes in the world.

  82. Jake

    I don’t believe that people actually know what they’re doing. Everyone just pretends to be a professional, but they just figure it out as they go. The ones who get the furthest in life are the ones who realize that first.

  83. Loretta

    I do not believe that if you work hard and perform to the best of your ability, you will be noticed in the work place.

  84. Pete

    I no longer believe that hard work is recognised and appreciated by employers – because even the people who do jack shit act like they work hard, and no one cares enough to disprove it

  85. Janna

    I no longer believe in being fully PREPARED before starting something. People hire me for my brain…and the learning’s in the doing.

    I no longer believe *I* need to be the doer of all my home, family, and business tasks. I can’t be everything to everyone AND run a successful business. There are many ways to run a household, own a business, and invest and grow a budget.

    I no longer believe I need experts to tell me what to do next. I have a good sense of it, and just need to pace myself and do the right *next* thing.

    I no longer believe that the security of a corporate job is worth the trade-offs.

    I no longer believe other people’s moods are my responsibility. I can provide support within reason, but it’s their job to take care of themselves and get the outside help they need.

    I no longer believe other people (friends, prospective clients) are looking to me to be a glossy, perfect person. They want me to be real and thoughtful, and bring my trademark energy to our interactions.


    Awesome! I no longer believe in so many things. In positive, I now believe that conflict and going out and telling the world what you think is actually necessary. It creates, it exposes who you are to the world. If you happen to be a really grouchy-couchy old man with really tight-a## world views, own up to it. You are who you are whether you speak about it in public or not. So scratch all that balony about peace being acceptance of everything around you. No matter what you do, your actions will always speak for you. In any case, make actions coherent with what you say. All the best.

  87. Erika

    I no longer believe that I’m not worthy of a high-quality partner.

    I no longer equate busyness with productivity.

  88. Jonathan

    I no longer believe that you have one career path or one specialisation that you’ll stick with for the whole of your life. The idea that a careers adviser can interview you at school without really knowing you and decree what you’ll be good at is damaging to people’s dreams. We are lucky to be in an age now where diversity on a resume is an asset as it should be. So like the song “Sunscreen” states some of the most interesting 40-year olds still don’t know what they want to be. Keep your eyes and mind open to opportunities

  89. Sonya

    I no longer believe that flouride is a toxic waste that does us no good. But I’m still kinda on the fence about mass fluoridation…. Mass medication without consent is a bit squicky lol! And I no longer believe that glyphosate is frightening, or that organic always = better, or pesticide free.

    Weird things to mention I know, but doing the research using PubMed etc and crunching the numbers (especially on flouride intakes and the renal system etc) was a revelation to me. Don’t think I’ve convinced my family yet, but I’m never looking back 😄😄

  90. Eric Allen

    I don’t believe anymore that there are no stupid questions, but I believe you remain stupid if you don’t ask questions you believe everyone else knows. I usually find other people don’t know the answers but were afraid to ask. (And sometimes you should ask Google first.)

  91. Fiona

    I don’t believe that my current job is the only way to earn money. I can earn money doing something I enjoy and gives me a good work/life balance. I just need to focus on finding it.

  92. Tod

    I no longer believe in America

  93. claire

    I no longer think weight loss is to do so much with calorie counting as cutting carbs and refined sugars
    I no longer believe the UK press is free but instead reports what pleases the Government of the day

  94. Tony Horner

    I no longer believe that you have to make six-figures to be rich.

  95. Raven Vinnie

    I no longer believe that taking time strictly just to improve skills that aren’t 100% guaranteed to make me a profit right away is selfish or stupid, so as long as I’m mindfully deciding to do so.

  96. Michael

    I no longer believe in obstacles or excuses.
    Recent events have led me to adopt a new belief that I am completely responsible for the life I have now and the life I’ll have in the future. I have a new sense of ownership. I am pursuing my dreams without any option of failure. I will not settle; I will not let anything stop me. I hope to sit across from you one day to share my story.

  97. Gretchen

    Used to believe the glass was half empty. Now I believe the glass is half full and it needs a cocktail napkin under it.

  98. Daniel

    I no longer believe that feeling competitive is always a bad thing.

    I no longer believe that I have “potential” if I would just work harder. Working harder is the hardest part for me and the bit I admire most in others.

    I no longer believe that I have any real idea about what I want in life.

  99. Mari

    I no longer believe that I have to do a grand thing to be successful in my term. Small accumulations of good things will lead me to the goal I like to reach.

    I no longer believe that the skill is the most important factor to be a good artist. now I believe that good attitude toward life is also important. Keep up beat!!

  100. Stacy

    I used to think my appearance did not matter; that was also when I used to think my mind was my greatest asset. However, after a stranger bought me three pairs of shoes and lunch because I said, “Merry Christmas! I like your hat,” while at work, I realized that my mind wasn’t my greatest asset—it’s my personality. And since people judge others personalities based on what they wear, I deduced that not caring about my appearance limits my opportunities. I always stood out no matter what I looked like and people have always been willing to present me with opportunities they would not present to other people. I always thought it was because all those adults thought I was bright, which they did. I had not realized I was undervaluing my natural charm and charisma. The fact is people do not remember the person who just works really hard because everyone works hard. It is an American value; we believe in hard work. They do remember the person with whom they made meaningful contact, was witty, spontaneous, and intelligent. Ramit is right—there are other traits just as important as being smart. I guess I hadn’t noticed either.

  101. Jamie Bodnarchuk

    I no longer believe anyone gets what they deserve. You get what you negotiate. I wish I would have learned that lesson years ago.

  102. Glenn Letourneau

    I no longer believe that Capitalism is the root of all evil and that the pursuit of wealth is the act of greedy sociopaths.

    I also no longer believe that I don’t want to be rich, because it would somehow lead to bigger problems… there aren’t much bigger (first world) problems than worrying about paying for food, medical expenses, housing costs, and basic day to day necessities… I think I’d like to experience how the 1% lives and make my decision based on that.

  103. Pranav Lal

    I no longer believe:
    1. Employers will like an employee who is an all rounder. Most employers want to label me and determine where I fit.
    2. God. Its certainly a useful concept in some situations but that is all.
    3. The economy determines how well you do. (Thanks Rameet)
    4. There is a magic formula to start a business.
    5. Hard work always pays.

  104. Jinghuan

    I don’t believe things will never change, Every moment get yourself ready for change.

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  106. Dominic

    1. I don’t believe that being perfect is worth achieving: it’s better to get things 80% right and to keep moving forward, than, stagnating on a task because it isn’t perfect.

    2. I don’t believe in there being a right and wrong solution to any given problem: there are simply different options with different pros and cons.

  107. Domenic M.

    I don’t believe that there are checkpoints in life anymore. Used to be turn 18, go to college. At 22, graduate college with a degree in anything (didn’t matter, it was a degree) and start your job that you will be in until 65. 25 get married and have 2.3 kids (never figured out where the .3 was from). 65, find out that you don’t remember what it was you wanted to do when you retire, die at age 70-75.

  108. Wayne.

    I no longer believe that virtue is valued as much as before. It seems that there’s an increasing interest in being ‘savage’ and ‘hip’ over being kind and transparent. Social media is ironically making me feel anti-social. I still have hope though, and I’m holding my ground for being as good of a person as I can manage to be, and apologize when I fail.

  109. Angie

    I no longer believe that less is more.

  110. Steve

    I no longer believe that working hard is a path to success. I no longer believe in leadership. I no longer believe in honesty, duty and integrity.

  111. Esteban Godoy

    I no longer believe that you need 12 years to be ready for higher education.

  112. Anthony

    I no longer believe that academic achievements have any impact at all on whether an individual will be successful or not in the long run.

  113. Lord

    1. I no longer believe – or should I say value – perfection. I used to and whenever I felt that what I was going to say or what I was going to do will never be perfect — I stopped myself from even taking the first step towards doing it.

    2. I no longer believe that crunches will give me or will contribute to having a six pack ( I stopped doing them).

    3. I no longer believe that I am who I think I am. Whenever someone asks me to try something new – which previously made me respond with — “That’s just not me.” I stop myself from saying it and realize — that I can’t use my so-called perceived personality as a scapegoat for not trying something that is beyond my comfort zone.

  114. Dilip Shaw

    I don’t believe that anything other than knowledge is the KING. I also don’t believe that only money can make you happy, because when you add two ZEROS to your account you want to add two more, then two more, then you know — unlimited ZEROS. You forget that after your needs are over you are only running after ZEROS which in mathematics sense means running after NOTHING. If you really want to be happy then run towards being HAPPY – that’s the end – money is only a means. We all only run after means not the end, so we never find end of the tunnel and die one day. Foolishness I think.

  115. Zerlina Zhuang

    I no longer believe that I am not in a position to chase my dreams. I started 10 years late, but better late than never!

  116. Xo

    I no longer believe that can’t not achieve my dreams because I am a mother.

  117. Elissa

    I don’t believe that anyone knows what is better for me than me!

  118. Denis

    I don’t believe anymore that having money is a bad thing *curses hippie parents in broke*

  119. Swati

    I no longer believe that there should be labels such as introvert, ambivert or extrovert. They are regressive and offer people a sense of security for people belonging to such groups when we are actually independent species living in an interdependent society; vastly unique.

  120. Angélique Roux

    I no longer believe in closure, apparently. Haha.

    Anyway, I’ve discovered that our personalities aren’t fixed. They are 90% programmable which makes us capable of so much more than we can ever imagine.

  121. Candice

    I no longer believe you need money to make money. You need to work hard, take whatever opportunity approaches you (even if only makes you a bit more money) until an even better one comes along that is more suited to your purpose.

  122. Beatrice

    I no longer believe vulnerability is a weakness.

  123. aleks

    I no longer believe that:

    1. People are rationale
    2. Hypnosis is just a gimmick
    3. I am special
    4. The world is out to get me
    5. Men and women are equal
    6. I can succeed on my own
    7. Selling doesn’t matter

    • James

      That’s a really good list, aleks. It took me a long time to figure out a lot of those. Let me add one more that is perhaps the most difficult one to digest: Life is not always fair.

  124. Joseph

    I no longer believe that brute force can solve every problem.
    … that I am destined to be disorganized my whole life
    … that people who make more money than me are intimidating to me
    … that a person’s value is limited or measurable
    … that happiness comes from using people and things to prove something to myself and others.

  125. Iyman

    I no longer believe that we can take a little extra time to do things in a better way. If you want your work to be truly appreciated, you have to meet the deadlines.

  126. Karen Dudek-Brannan

    I don’t believe that there is only one clear route to success. The path can look different for different people.

    I also don’t believe that there are “bad” people and “good” people. There are only bad situations that bring out the worst in people and cause a whirlwind of bad decisions and habits. Anyone is capable of doing most things we consider immoral if they’re made vulnerable enough and backed in to a corner.

    Of course there are always exceptions to the rule. But in most cases, I hate to make the judgment and say, “What an asshole, I would never do something like that!” In truth, I probably would, and so would most other people. So I’m more forgiving now in that sense because I know some things are just human nature…which is why its so important to take care of yourself and set yourself up to make good choices.

  127. ivy

    I no longer believe that people who are in certain positions know better than others.

    I used to think when I didn’t understand why certain things were done the way they were, that the people who did them knew better. Surely they had examined all the options, made a thorough analysis, and eventually picked the best option for all parties involved. After all, that’s what they were there for and they surely were experts at hand.

    I now tend to think we are all just humans doing our jobs, nobody has everything figured all out and everybody just does things as they go along. And that some things are just done badly, because someone screwed up or didn’t know any better.

    Which is a comforting and empowering feeling for me. I no longer feel unqualified to do certain things, because I feel as if

  128. Isabella

    I no longer believe focusing on one thing in my life is beneficial for me. I prefer to have many things to work on and single-task on each of them.

    I also no longer believe a person should be labeled on the single job they do, but on all of the things that they involve themselves in. That is definitely a more interesting question.

  129. Stacy

    I no longer believe that hard work alone will guarentee success. Success is like a cake and hard work is only one ingredient.

  130. Ruben Dario

    I don’t longer believe in change. Whether good or bad change is difficult. I don’t longer believe that humanity can change.

    There’s only a small percent of people who are willing to put in the work to change. Those in this forum are more likely to be ‘changers.’

  131. Diane S

    I no longer believe that if you work hard that you will make it, that you will have money and succeed in what you are working at. I’ve worked hard my entire life, and guess what? I’ve had very limited financial success, even though I’m reasonably intelligent. And I’m frustrated with the success I’ve had in other areas of my life also. Working hard does not always mean anything – except that you get tired at the end of another long day.

  132. j

    I no longer believe I have “anything to offer the world.”

  133. Kyle

    I don’t believe practice makes perfect. You can practice all you want, but if your practicing (whatever it may be) improperly, you will ALWAYS fall short of your potential of practicing with proper form, technique, etc.

  134. James Murray

    I no longer believe that you need to be financially successful to lead a successful life. I think most of the important parts of life are made up from day to day experiences which add up to either a positive or negative outlook. The more I focus on the positive, the more successful I feel.

  135. Jason

    I no longer believe that getting a university degree will improve your life or even get you a “dream job”

    Having just completed my masters, I am still looking for jobs in my field. My side hustle of photography is currently bringing in a lot more income (and enjoyment) and it is something that I learned on my own.

  136. Jansen

    I grew up believing we were all born to do something in particular, to find our “calling” in life. Although it’s a nice sentiment, I now believe that type of thinking makes it too easy to just wait around until you suddenly “discover” your passion or purpose in life.

    The fact is, passion is something we have to cultivate on our own by sticking with something long enough to become good at it, and my purpose in life is whatever I make of it.

    • Julie

      Love this so much! Passion is a verb – I can bring my sense of fun and joy into anything I am doing. 🙂

  137. Ashlynn

    I no longer believe that once you reach 40+ that the ability to achieve your dreams stops, that you can’t develop something bolder or more fulfilling. It may be more difficult as far as risk with commitments you have made, but not impossible.

  138. Thalie

    1- I no longer believe that we are limited. We all have immense potentials that we deeply need to tap into. 2- I no longer believe that it’s impossible to achieve something. For instance, finding a job in the US or Canada as a sole trader. There’s always a way. 3- I no longer believe that once you learn a certain discipline, you get to stick to it for ever & ever. Having different experiences is always a plus and if we went through them it is for a reason. We are meant to be creative in our lives and achieve what is right for us.

  139. Kristi

    I don’t delieve that I would ever be able to make my dream come true, and take care of my family when the time comes and to make my mother proud of me

  140. Julie

    I no longer believe in being ‘comfortable.’ I used to think I would reach some magical point in my life when it became ‘easy,’ but now I see that’s not the point. When I attain the fitness level I want, I’ll need to keep working to maintain it. When I achieve financial freedom, I’ll have more money and time to manage. When I achieve my work goals, I’ll need to master a new set of skills.
    Not only does it take effort to do these things, but you can’t just get there and then relax. There will always be challenges in life if you’re doing it right. If I stay in my comfort zone, I’ll never reach my goals, and if I’m seeking comfort somewhere off in the future, that’s a pretty pathetic goal. I needed to get comfortable with feeling UNcomfortable, because that’s where growth happens. So much more life exists outside of one’s comfort zone.

    I’ve also learned that whether I want a dream job, a dream life or a dream body, I need to be a good steward of the body, job, life and money that I have NOW. If I don’t take care of what I have, I don’t allow room for anything better to come in.

  141. Julie

    I no longer believe it is ‘kind’ to tell people what they want to hear.

    I was always ‘the nice one’ and couldn’t bear to hurt anyone’s feelings.

    I now see how selfish that was of me. Yes, incredibly selfish! In reality, I couldn’t handle the thought of being disliked.

    In reality, giving honest feedback can be the greatest gift you can give a person – even if it’s difficult for them to hear.
    There’s no need to be purposely unkind about it, but even with the most caring delivery, the truth often sounds harsh.

    However, we do our loved ones a great disservice when we are dishonest with them in favor of telling them only what they want to hear.

    As one of my dearest (and most brutally honest) friends likes to say,
    “What seems the most unloving is often the most loving.” And vice versa.

  142. peter

    I no longer believe Science cannot go wrong, that new technology and innovations are “ethically neutral” and it’s the people that decide the direction.

    Of course, a lot of the direction a technology will go is decided by people, but I now realise that some technology is easier to use for good, and some for bad.

    Also, defining what is good and what is bad is MUCH more difficult than I thought…
    In Genetics, for example, when are we removing diseases from kids to help them, and when are we making “designer babies”. What level of modification is acceptable is bound to vary with how people think of the technology, and the consensus opinion in itself will depend on soo many factors that it will be evolving constantly…

    In sum, I no longer believe there’s such a thing as clearly marked boundaries between right and wrong. there’s a LOT more grey than we’re comfortable admitting.

  143. Moira

    I no longer believe that the ‘head’ is a better guide than the ‘heart’. Your head can lie and deceive but your heart doesn’t.

    By ‘heart’ I do not mean emotions/lust etc – I mean your inner navigation (?) that leaps in response to certain interesting paths despite ‘no-no’ reactions from a sensible ‘head’.

    My head said I should do what earns money. But it was too tedious, I lost huge amounts of confidence – there’s not much money in that! Now I realise that success – and money – was possible in the ‘heart’ direction because success doesn’t depend on skill, but on interest and engagement.

    So I no longer believe that you can truly, fully succeed at something you don’t enjoy, however much work or discipline you throw at it, just because other people succeed at it and say its because they ‘worked hard’.

    So I also no longer believe in ‘working hard’ – hard work is useless without intelligence, direction and encouragement (which can be in various ways). You could spend your whole life ‘re-inventing the wheel’. I now believe success does not equal ‘10% talent and 90% sweat’ – its ‘10% talent and 90% interest with encouragement from a supportive environment’.

  144. Deep Zo

    I no longer believe that it’s to continuously Do this or that or Change this or that that we were born. Ah the joy when I first beheld the joy of really Doing nothing for a long stretch of time – neither with body nor with mind. Stillness & the Joy in just Being! Now I can invite back the experience to me as I wish, yet I keep Doing the necessary. But only strictly what is necessary. Nothing for greed, all for need only. Now is that I know real peace & joy – after more than four decades of searching!

    I no longer believe that anyone’s perceptions of the world, including mine, would ever be total reality. As many perceptions as people – & everyone is ‘right’, all right, from their perspective. Hence I may not know anything about anything after applying all my intellectual & analytical undertsanding.

    I know now that I am.
    I know now that I know not, else.

    & finally in peace I am restful.

  145. Michelle

    I no longer believe behavior that is complying is good – I used to think if someone simply did what they said they would do then it was a success, but now I believe that choosing instead of complying is far more powerful. I don’t want kids who do something just because I said so. I don’t want employees who do what they are asked to do but resent it, don’t understand it, or disagree with it. This doesn’t mean that leading/teaching/parenting is constant minutiae and second guessing of leadership, but that developing others is much more intrinsic and someone meaningfully engaged in cooperation and the big picture will make the sum far greater than its parts would suggest.

    I no longer believe that having excess fat is unhealthy – I think it is a sign that something else is going on but to try to remove fat as the enemy seems to me like trying to remove a scar instead of seeing it for what it is – the body’s attempt to heal damage. And removing it just means that more rework down the line – I have yet to see long term, sustainable, not-terrible (not even enjoyable!), reproducible weight loss success. I know many are trying to figure this out but it’s so much more than the common assumptions of energy in/out, laziness, and lack of discipline. The sneering comments directed toward fat people, if you just for a moment assume it’s not something they are doing but a system gone awry in their body, are horrific and unhelpful. We think we know how to “fix” obesity but we as a culture (US) just keep getting bigger. Sure, labeling fat people as lazy or eating their feelings might shame someone into starving themselves and forcing themselves to exercise, but it won’t heal their body. Why are bodies obese? They eat more than they expend. Why do they eat more? We stop there. Why is the body going through voluntary obesity – like hibernating animals…what is triggering the body to WANT more energy storage and upping signals of hunger and cravings? Why are some humans “meh” about hyperpalatible foods (like me) and others can’t get enough? I think it’s fascinating with that point of view – if we don’t just stop and blame the individual for their lack of discipline or wanting it enough or hiding behind their fat. To some extent we are all along for the ride in our bodies and food intake is essential to survival so systems will override what our frontal lob thinks is the “right way” or “right portion” to eat. I was prejudiced against fat people for most of my life and I have an entirely new perspective now.


    I no longer believe giving it your all ensures success on one particular project.

    I no longer believe being positive is enough.

    I no longer believe I must be like most people, in order to be happy or extremely successful.

  147. Joshua

    I no longer believe that I can blame anyone or anything else for who or where I am. While I realize that most things are outside of my direct control, my choices are still what have gotten me to where I am.

  148. David

    I don’t believe that it’s too late to change yourself, try new things or things you always wanted to do, but did always put off.

  149. Amanda

    I no longer believe that management has no use. I still have little interest in being one, but I see its value and understand its role.

  150. Gwendolyn Smith

    I no longer believe a sober life is a boring life.

    • sally mae

      Yes! Way to go Gwendolyn 🙂 Thank you for sharing this!

  151. Craig

    I no longer believe in listening to people that can’t be trusted. Talk is cheap. Be around people that can challenge you and help you be your best self.

    You have to go through the dirt to find the gems (top performers, mentors, life-long friends, advisors) that can take you to the next level.

  152. Mbulelo Hermanus

    Hi Ramit

    Just like you Ramit, I don't believe that intelligence automatically translates to success when one grows older. When I was in junior primary I realised I had an above average IQ to the next person. When I got to High School my straight A pass rate continued. But today I'm a miserable & depressed got a dead end job & living from paycheck to paycheck. Maybe it's because in these parts of the world it's not about what you know it's about who you know.

  153. sojourner

    I no longer believe that working twice as hard to make half as much to fund a system which purports to grant me rights, but in actuality trashes them repeatedly is a good ROI for my time and energy

  154. Khadevis Robinson

    I no longer Believe that Good thing Always Come to Those that wait!

  155. RTC

    I no longer believe as a female you can "have it all" i.e. maintain career trajectory/rise-time and bear/raise children. This fallacy instilled by parents hoping to be grandparents is especially horrible for women who grow up believing it is possible and want both.
    I believe you can excel at one-at-a-time, but not both at the same time. There are consequences to ensure the perfect timeline for either option and they overlap. You will always have to juggle priorities and it will either take a toll on your career or family.

  156. Jacqui

    I know longer believe it is easy to find people who support you.

    People will talk the talk but make themselves unavailable and I don't like chasing them. After reaching out to them 2-3 times, I assume something else is more important that needs their attention.

    And they don't attempt to contact me again, it was not meant to be. I don't hold any negative thoughts about them, I just feel they don't understand the importance of communication.