Happy Friday. Today I thought it’d be fun to put down all the stuff we hate spending money on. Now, I’m perfectly willing to spend lots of money on stuff I love, but not these things (below). Check some of mine out and add your own comments.
Dry cleaning. What kind of damn service cleans things without using water? I still don’t understand how this works. All I understand is that it’s outrageously expensive to clean things, and it just looks like they used a lint roller and a sheet of Bounce to make my sweaters look smooth and smell nice. Also, I hate people who think they have to dry clean things THAT DON’T NEED DRY CLEANING, or dryclean all the time.
Expensive restaurants that leave you completely unsatisfied. These are the foofy places that serve you 1 eggroll (split in 2) and call it an appetizer. That’s a tease, not an appetizer, you jackass manager. Also, there are usually a lot of old people in these kinds of restaurants. Maybe it’s because they can afford to pay 100% for 1/6 of a meal. Give me some Taco Bell, please.
Books that are not good.
Shoes that look like regular shoes but cost $200. I was shopping with 2 friends in San Francisco last weekend (1 guy and 1 girl) and the girl decided to go shoe shopping. My friend and I just sat down, facing a wall and hoping to die. Anyway, it turns out that we were facing a wall of Coach shoes. So when the girl ambled over about 20 minutes later (kill me), I pointed out this pair of shoes to her. “Look at this shoe,” I said, “it looks so trashy! It’s just a regular pair of Keds, and it’s $78.00 just because it’s Coach. I could get the same shoe at Payless for $7.99. Give me a break!!!” Little did I notice the woman sitting directly to my left, about 2 feet away, who was currently getting some shoes brought to her. Which shoes were they? Of course–the trashy ones I had pointed out. Great. And of course my jackass friends knew exactly what I had done, and they forced me to sit there awkwardly for 10 more minutes. I hate them. I would have done the same thing to them, though.
Organic groceries. Whole Foods. All the BS foods that are designed to make you feel better about yourself rather than actually feeding you. STOP WITH THE LOW SELF-ESTEEM AND JUST GET SOME NORMAL CARROTS.
Anything more than $5 for parking. A few years ago, I had an interview with a hedge fund and they told me to come to San Francisco and park in this lot, etc. So I did, and the interview lasted the whole day. At the end of the day, every single company will give you vouchers to cover any expenses you incurred during the interview. (You shouldn’t be losing money interviewing for a company.) Anyway, they were all “Have a nice day!” so I politely asked about a voucher for my parking, which (remember) they had told me to park in. The lady looked completely surprised and said, “Uhh, let me check on that” and disappeared into a back room. About 3 minutes later she came out and said, “Sorry, we don’t do that.” REMEMBER, THIS WAS A MULTI-BILLION-DOLLAR HEDGE FUND that couldn’t validate my parking. It turned out to be $27.00. On that fateful day, I vowed that if I accepted the offer, I would negotiate at least $27 into my signing bonus.
The price of food at athletic events. I suppose that since I never go to athletic events, this is a decidedly theoretical argument.
Maintenance on stuff you already spent a lot on. Examples: cameras, washing machines, and I guess dry cleaning.
Food like bananas that ALWAYS seems to go bad when you’re a single person. Now, when I buy groceries, I just start immediately eating them in a race against time. It’s like I’ll be in the car on the way home and I have an apple in my mouth, I’m polishing a pear in one hand, and opening a package of strawberries in the other.
1-hour photo. I hated this enough to write an entire article about it.
Laundromats, which are seriously expensive.
Gym signup fees. If anyone on this site doesn’t negotiate their gym memberships (THEY ARE COMPLETELY NEGOTIABLE), I am going to hit you.
There are so many more!!!!!!!!! But for now, add your own to the comments and let’s get this going.
- Things I Hate, my comedy blog that is much, much more expansive than this list
- My thoughts on being cheap vs. frugal
- Things that are irrational but worth it
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