Not surprisingly, men sent the same horrid emails to all 3 posts. Men who were 65 almost responded the same way as men who were 18. Emails usually fell into the “is that really your picture? you’re hot cutie” to the “i am introverted and lonely and a nice guy”

I really think the 80/20 rule applies to dating. 20% of the men actively are dating 80% of the women. The other 80% of men are in relationships/couldn’t get a date to save their life.

P.S.

Checkout this post in the Craiglist Best: Replying to w4m casual encounters ads? A little feedback

The confidence thing is really hard for a lot of people, and then there are those that have too much without anything to back it up.

The key is to be able to keep it real, analyze others and yourself, and use what you learn to your advantage. Don’t just go through life with your head in the clouds…but instead make every second of it count — whether it be personal life or business life. I don’t want to spend time just bringing home a paycheck. I want to be engaged, stimulated, involved…I want to grow, thrive, make a difference…that takes a little more effort. But that extra effort sets me apart from most of the other 200 people who I work with…and it really doesn’t take that much more effort to be effective…it is easy – you just cut out all the BS and Get Things Done!

Most people won’t even take the 1st step because they’re so held back by perfectionism and/or terrified of failure.

Even if you do something badly, the fact that you’ve tried it at all can pull you ahead and connect you with people that are going places.

I’m not familiar with Craig’sList; my SO does all the Internet buying and selling. I love this post, though, because it goes along with the 80/20 theory: focus on what matters. In this case, what makes you stand out as the best.

I would like to say, though, that I don’t consider setting yourself up at your company as an expert in your field is difficult to do. Some self-confidence and the guts to step up and say what you think is all it really takes (assuming, of course, you’re not an ass and actually know what you’re talking about). I’m constantly amazed at the amount of respect I get at work from people 10, 20, 30+ my senior who legitimately want my opinion because I know my job, AND I’m not afraid to show it.

Your note about negotiation is absolutely true, too. My position calls for contract negotiations, so when I interviewed, I naturally applied my negotiation talents to that as well. I got a $3K jump and a $2500 lump sum relocation payment from only a few hour’s wait. I’ve also gotten a more than 8% raise in the past year from just doing my job well and being frank about my expectation that my pay reflects my impact.

The most important thing to remember in negotiations: going in with a win-win attitude is the best, most effective way to get what you want. Even for salary negotiations. I firmly believe my company was getting a fabulous deal by getting me on their payroll, so I considered their concessions in that department to be a win on their part (hiring me), and a win on my part (paying me what I’m worth).