I deleted a 2,000 word mega-post to write this instead
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This week has been very theoretical and high-level — on PURPOSE.
See, most people who write online have audiences with the intelligence of a snail. As a result of the misguided belief that they have to appeal to everyone, they spend their time writing Top 10 lists to get SEO traffic. I avoid this because (1) I don’t understand SEO at all and (2) I simply kick off stupid people from my list and leave the cream of the crop as subscribers.
The truth is, I can afford to spend time investing in deeper areas like intellectual frameworks, psychological techniques, and deep case studies to help you lead a rich life.
I’d rather take a long-term perspective instead of pandering with cheap Top 10 lists.
There’s one problem.
Sometimes, people take the high-level material, feel good for a couple days…and then NEVER DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT.
I don’t want those readers. If you haven’t taken action from my material and you’ve been reading for over 3 months, let’s not waste each other’s time.
Why would I do this? What kind of business person ASKS his readers to leave?
I do — because I’d rather have a core group of people who are invested in taking action than a large group of people who use this material as intellectual entertainment.
For example, after writing a massive post on this year being the year of taking control, I got this comment:
How much dairy were you eating beforehand? I eat minimal dairy (as in…maybe 2 tablespoons of cream cheese each week) like your example friend, so I’ve only briefly considered that cutting it out entirely would make a difference. Do you think going from minimal to none can have a large impact on weight/health?
ARE YOU SHITTING ME? After reading nonsensical comments like this, I had to reconsider whether I wanted to be alive or not.
This question is (1) totally off-topic and (2) actually betrays a lack of understanding of how top performers act. The correct answer is: TEST IT!
Other writers will give you Top 5 Ways to Digest Your Food. I will kick you in the face and show you how to test it.
For example, here are a few things I’ve tested in the last 12 months
- How to take naps as short as 15 minutes (took me 6 months to do this)
- What to eat before the gym to lift heavier (carbs, duh)
- What to wear to get different reactions (try bowties)
- Hilarious text messages to guys/girls (you wish)
- How to write party invitations that get massive RSVPs
Or…I could have gone and randomly asked someone, Hey, do you think this would work?
THE ANSWER COMES FROM THE TEST. And that’s what I’m going to show you today.
I actually had a 2,000-word monster post with all-new frameworks on changing your behavior READY to post today…but enough is enough.
Instead of another framework, we’re going to APPLY the mindset shifts we’ve already created in 2013.
Oh, you want to learn how to get a better job where your boss actually recognizes that you bust your ass? One where you get paid what you deserve?
Ok, I can help with that.
You want to know how people just like you were stagnant and made subtle changes to earn more, travel, and even become more socially fluent?
Yeah, I’ll show you how to do that.
You want to know the exact words to say to someone you don’t know to build rapport?
Yep — I’ve got those for you at the end of this email.
Starting today, every post and email I write this month will end with a very specific action I want you to take.
If you’re not committed to following through, please leave.
But if you ARE ready to follow through…if you are ready to trust that I’ve tested and refined my material enough that it works, then I invite you to follow my system and come along. That’s how I get results for my students — the results I want to get for you in the next month.
These students put aside their barriers and said, “You know what? My approach clearly isn’t working, so I’m going to trust this weird, cocky Indian dude.” When they trusted my systems, you can see remarkable results my students got.
I want you to be on that list THIS year.
Ask yourself this: If you keep doing the same thing, what will life look like 10 years from now?
Will you be earning the kind of money that lets you live the lifestyle you want?
Will you be able to take a weekend trip whenever you WANT to?
Will you be able to buy a round for your friends without worrying how much it costs?
Will you be living up to your potential?
Or will you wonder what could have been…comparing yourself to your friends…and changing your tune to, “I should have done that…but now it’s too late…”
My goal is to be the angel in your inbox looking out for you — sometimes pushing you even harder than you think you can push yourself.
That’s why I want you to take one, simple action step this weekend.
I’ll start by telling you that I’ve always admired people who could talk to anyone: the checkout lady at the grocery store, a random Fedex guy, a person walking their dog.
Guys, I’m not naturally like that!! I didn’t even know how to talk to my doorman (since I don’t talk about sports, what am I supposed to say?). Truthfully, I was such a nerd that I even bought a book on how to talk to anyone. What! We all need some help.
But over time, I came to learn how to talk to people at cocktail parties…at coffee shops…or random people at the store. Now I use it to banter on national TV, live on-air in front of millions of people, as I did earlier this week.
Here’s your first assignment: Start a conversation with 1 person you’ve never met, and leave a comment below reporting on how it went.
This could be at the bar, a coffee shop, the grocery store, wherever. It can be a guy or girl.
If this terrifies you, don’t worry. Here are 5 easy, proven lines you can use to start up conversations with anyone:
1. “What kind of dog is that?”
Easiest conversation on earth to strike up. Pet lovers are so deprived of normal human contact that all they want to do is talk about their pets to anybody who will listen.
2. “I was actually curious about [book in their hand, gadget, whatever they’re working on]. How is it?
Note: Don’t do this with someone’s physics homework.
3. “Is that a good book?”
Btw, if you find someone reading MY book, you have definitely found the man/woman of your dreams.
4. “I think it’s funny watching people before they get their coffee…look how miserable they look.”
This is hilarious because it’s the elephant in the room.
5. “Is it a busy day? It looks pretty [busy/quiet].”
Easy to say to a mailman/waitress/hostess.
Are these canned lines? YES! Attention weirdos: SCRIPTS WORK. First, you use them and get comfortable. Then, you become so confident, you don’t need them any more.
Listen closely: Top performers have their social skills nailed. They don’t sit and do Excel all day and expect the boss to recognize them for their brilliance. They know how to talk to their co-workers…build alliances…and even ENJOY meeting new people.
You don’t have to become a talk-show host to become better at social skills. Even a few days of practice will dramatically improve your skills. (For example, I was pretty good when I went on book tour…and then I went through media training. It took me to another level.)
I can teach you the social skills that I painfully learned — the lessons are included in my Dream Job course (opening soon), and I have actual video teardowns for you next week — but you have to be willing to take action, to test skills/behaviors on yourself.
If you want to take control of your life, land your Dream Job, and get paid what you deserve, I can teach you HOW. But you have to be willing to TAKE ACTION.
It’s OK to bomb on this assignment. In fact, due to some of the dorks who read my site, I’m expecting some hilarious stories. But it is NOT OK to do nothing.
This is your first test.
Let’s separate the whiners from the do-ers.
Start 1 conversation with a stranger and tell me how it went in the comments below.
By the way, I’m continuing to send send special material to people on my newsletter that you will never see here. Join 160,000+ other people on my Insider’s List here — free.
If you’re like me, you’ve read dozens of social skills articles about different “types” of handshakes and giving ...Read More