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Start Here: “The Ultimate Guide to Habits”

2013: The Year of Taking Control

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There are a few things in life that should instantly make you pause and proceed very cautiously.

  1. Your boyfriend/girlfriend asking you about people you’ve dated in the past.
  2. A Chinese/Asian/non-white mother asking you if you drink or if you think real estate is a good investment.
  3. Anyone asking you, “WOW! You look great! How’d you lose all that weight?” or any other questions about your recent self-improvement in health, money, spirituality, or your career.

The last one is especially dangerous since it sounds innocent, but actually, you are about to be slaughtered by the vagaries of human behavior.

Every year, I like to kick off each year with a big theme. In the last few years, I’ve focused on hustling and mastering the game being played around you. This year we’re going even bigger.

Welcome to the Year of Taking Control

In the next four weeks, I’m going to release material you’ve never seen before that will help you tackle psychological barriers, give you the word-for-word scripts to improve social skills, and help you take control of…

  • Waking up earlier
  • Being more productive
  • Overcoming negative “invisible scripts”
  • Taking the things you “know” you should do — exercising, being thankful, earning more, finding a better job — and actually helping you DO them

But first, back to the RED ALERTS of self improvement…

A few days ago, I walked into a minefield as I was having dinner with a family friend. She noticed I’d been working out, and she asked me what exactly I do for my workout/diet.

After years of working in self-development, red flags immediately went up. To any outside observer, I looked like the normal and lovable Ramit you know and love. Well…at least the Ramit you know.

But why did red flags go up? Because in one of the oddest quirks of human behavior, even if someone genuinely asks you what you’ve been doing to improve, when you answer, they will get defensive.

Here’s how the conversation went:

Friend: “So what have you been doing to work out?”

Ramit: (Cautious, as if I’m walking into a minefield) “Well…I used to be really skinny, so I decided to learn how to work out. I started eating right and got a trainer.”

Friend: “But what do you eat now? Are you off carbs?” (Notice how they’re already laying down the invisible script: “You may look good and I may want to look like that, but there’s no way I could go without carbs”)

Ramit: “I did try a few different things. When I went off dairy, that made a big difference. Would you ever consider doing that?”

Friend: “But I hardly eat dairy. And anyway, I want to enjoy my life. I don’t want to do these extreme things. I’d rather just be healthy like I already am.” (4 invisible scripts in 4 sentences. See if you can spot them.)

This went on for a while, until I finally said: “Did you notice that every answer you’ve given me has started with ‘but’?” She actually stared at me with her jaw dropped. Nobody had ever called them on this before.

Sometimes, it takes someone to point out the patterns that we’ve been doing for our entire lives…but we’ve never noticed.

These invisible scripts are so deep, we don’t even notice them.

Video: The pain of being out of control

Being out of control can be debilitating. Look at this video of some IWT students talking about how they were out of control with their money…their jobs…and their overall lives.

Our scripts can be hauntingly powerful. We can actually WANT to do something — really truly want to lose weight, or get in control of our finances — but our scripts get in the way.

For example, one of my friends is a mother of 2 who recently got really fit. When her friends ask her, “You look amazing! What do you eat?” and she tells them, their first response is consistently:

“Oh. I’m Asian…I can’t give up rice.”

How can we spend our entire lives worrying about money, losing weight, or living a rich life — yet when we see someone just like us, doing it successfully, our barriers instantly surface to hold us back from changing?

The weirdest part is we ACTUALLY want to change!

Yet when powerful barriers hold us back, it’s like a ship trying to drag an invisible anchor around. No matter how much you try, no matter how fast you try to go, there’s always something holding you in place.

And over the last year, I’ve encountered this in startling ways.

I made a dumb mistake and paid for it

A few months ago, I ordered two jackets online. The boxes sat in my room, 5 feet from my bed, for a month. It was an insanely busy month of work and travel, and by the time I tried them on and discovered they didn’t fit, the 30-day return policy had expired.

I acknowledged I was a dumbass but like any Indian person, I decided that “no” is the beginning of the conversation. (My dad told me a funny story about some Indian people who wanted to buy some land near a temple. The land was selling for $550,000. They walked in and offered $325,000. Can you imagine selling land to a bunch of Indians? They walk in with 3 shoes and a goat and wipe their hands. DEAL’S DONE!)

I decided to take the jackets into the store and get them tailored so I could at least wear them. This is when things started going wrong.

I spend a lot at this store, so I have a lady who hooks me up with advance notice on sales and helps me shop for stuff. Ok, first of all, who the hell has a personal shopper and how ridiculous is that? I know.

Anyway, in the middle of a busy week, I took an hour off to do this godforsaken errand. When I walked in, she lit up. “Hey Ramit!” she said. She’s sweet, plus I think she’s going to pay for her future kids’ college educations off my commissions. I asked her if there was any chance of me returning the coats. “I wish I could,” she said apologetically, “but it’s past the return period.”

Ugh, ok. Could I get them altered? “Sure, but we’ll have to charge you.”

I was not expecting this. “How much?” I asked. Her response: “$65 for that one.”

Wait a second. I already didn’t want to be there. Now I find out that I bought these jackets online at full price, and not only can I not return them…but I’m going to have pay MORE?

“Forget it,” I said. “I’d rather give these away.” I was already frustrated having to run this stupid errand, and now I’d have to pay more for clothes I didn’t even want? I packed up my stuff and left.

As I walked out of there, I was pretty mad. You know when you’ve been a loyal customer and a company doesn’t treat you right? I’ve spent thousands of dollars in that store, and that lady has made a lot on commissions. In my head, she should have just offered to have the alteration done for free, knowing that I’d be a long-time customer.

A few days later, I was still thinking about why this bothered me. Was it the poor customer service? Was I just feeling entitled?

Then I realized it. I thought I was mad at the store policy…but I was really mad at myself. I had all these thoughts in my head (“I’m a good customer….they should pick up the tab…they should reward customer loyalty”)…but I hadn’t said ANY of these things to the woman at the shop!

How could she know this?

It’s funny — we get frustrated at our jobs…our bosses…our income…our lack of travel…

But how many of us actually get mad at ourselves? Mad because maybe we COULD get the things we wanted…if we only asked for them.

This crystallized what I’ve been hearing from tens of thousands of IWT readers over the last few years.

  • We KNOW we want to be more than just ordinary people working at ordinary jobs.
  • We’re WILLING to put in the time and work. We’re not asking for a free ride.
  • But we don’t know WHAT to do.
  • And even if we KNOW what we want…we often have invisible scripts and barriers holding us back.
  • And yet with ONE small tweak — one script, one change, one barrier exposed — we can often find that dream job, earn more, get in shape, improve our social skills, or even have better relationships.

That’s when I knew what the theme of this year would be on I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

2013: The Year of Taking Control

When we’re in our early 20s, the world is our oyster. We can do anything — we have multiple passions, and it’s totally OK to take the time to “figure it out”:

But over time, we turn 26…then 28…then 30. And as we get older, we start making excuses.

“Oh, I like to have my time to myself when I get home from work.”

“Yeah, he did it, but I don’t think he ever goes out any more.”

“Well, I’d do that, but I have _____ (kids, debt, an OK job, etc.)”

Then one day, we wake up and wonder how our lives turned out the way they did…

“I wanted to fly around and consult for CEOs…so how did I get stuck in this dead-end job?”

“I used to play sports. Why am I tired just walking up stairs?”

“I wanted to travel abroad at least 3x/year, but I can’t even pay my bills. WTF?”

Time to make a change. But how?

How most people approach taking control

I have a confession: I used to have the body of a supermodel — a female supermodel. I was 5’11” and 127 lbs.

Even though I would work out for 6 months at a time, I would never get big. Never mind that I had no idea how to work out properly or how to eat. I concocted this grandiose notion that “I can never get as big as THOSE guys.” It actually became part of my self-concept.

Years later, I learned I was guilty of “fuckarounditis,” where I would go to the gym and mess around, lifting this and that, never using a strategy, then get frustrated when I saw no results.

This doesn’t just apply to fitness. Take careers, for example. We have jokers who send out 100+ copies of their resume, thinking “If I just send 1 more, that’ll be the ticket!” Or they complain about how getting a job is all about WHO you know, not WHAT you know…then they fail to actually get to know anyone. Please get the hell out of my face, you whiners.

Some people make the opposite mistake: They believe that if they want to achieve goals, they have to do the EXTREME VERSION of getting to that goal.

Money example: “I don’t want to have to track every penny of my spending for the rest of my life!” (You don’t, but that invisible script allows them to not track anything at all.)

Health example: “I don’t want to have to watch every single thing I eat forever. I like having a treat now and then!” (Similar barrier. Btw, the alternative is to keep doing exactly what you’ve been doing.)

Relationship example: “So you want me to communicate better. You’re saying I have to tell you EVERY SINGLE THING I’m thinking. That’s just not how I’m built!” (Nobody wants to hear your annoying thoughts, moron. They DO want you to communicate better.)

These “extreme-reach” barriers are convenient excuses to continue doing what we’ve been doing forever. And many people who claim they want a goal — like “passive income” or “6-pack abs” — actually want the RESULT, but are never willing to do the work to get them.

I ran into this with one woman on my email list. I asked my readers, “What’s one thing you CLAIM you want to do, but you don’t do it?” She wrote back, telling me she wants to run 3x/week. I said, why don’t you run once/week?

Her response floored me: “I don’t really see the point of running once/week.”

She would rather dream about running 3x/week…than ACTUALLY run once/week.

How many of us do this? We WANT these big, grandiose goals…but if I asked you, “What are you going to do TOMORROW to move towards it?” we would have no answer? Or we’d have a dozen ideas…none of which we really believe in.

It’s human nature to skip over the details. But that’s where IWT comes in…

To be in control, you don’t have to be in control of everything.

As I become more and more in control of my life, this is a principle I’ve discovered.

For example, I don’t cook. (My mom’s response: “You need a wife.” She seriously said that.)

But eating healthy food is important to me, so I have a guy who cooks food for me. Yes, I could read a few good books and learn to cook, but it’s not a priority for me right now.

Another example:

If it means the difference between getting something important done and not doing it, I’ll almost always default to “getting it done” (even if I don’t do it myself).

BUT, there’s an exception.

It’s one thing to pay for someone to clean your apartment, or mow your lawn, or even cook for you.

But for the critical things in life that only you can do — like finding your dream job — it pays to be in control.

One $5,000 raise in your 20s can be worth over $1 million over the course of your life.

And it’s the difference between waking up every day and wanting to hit the “sleep” button on the alarm for the 5th time…or waking up EAGER to get to work.

My philosophy: Take control of the BIG WINS in your life: Money, career, health, relationships. For the rest, decide how important they are to you.

You don’t have to be in control of everything to be in control of your life.

This Year: We Take Control

In the spirit of BIG WINS, we’ll be tackling big improvements like improving social skills, finding dream jobs, and becoming more productive.

Notice I’m not talking about worthless small savings, like saving $3/day on lattes. I’m tired of dreaming small. And I know you’re tired of setting pointless “New Year’s resolutions” of vague things (“I want to become a nicer person!” “I want to exercise”), knowing that you’re not going to do them even as you set them!

No more.

Let others focus on pointless tactical maneuvers and small wins. We’re focused on BIG WINS — the ones that are going to change our lives.

And over the next 4 weeks, we’re going to cover them in detail.

We’ll go through 3 steps:

1. Understanding psychology
Some people think I’m mean to my readers. What they don’t understand is after writing about psychology for 8 years, I’m lucky to be sane.

People constantly want to jump to the tactics without understanding their psychological barriers. These are the people who join my Earn1K program (to earn money on the side) and immediately ask, “Do I get on Twitter? How do I get more clients? What about a Facebook page?” I kick them out. Without tackling your psychological barriers, no amount of tactics will help. That’s why we spend so much time going over psychology and behavioral change on this site.

Here, I’ll show you.

Here’s an example of terrible psychological barriers in action. In response to a depressing article about unemployment, one commenter responds:

“If nothing else, these stories have convinced me to save save save save my money like my life depends on it. I’m in my late 20s and already trying to figure out what I will do when I become unemployable in 20 years and have to live the next 30 off of what I managed to scrape together during my short career.”

This person is in their late 20s and planning for failure! Talk about a lack of control. Would your most successful friend ever talk like this?

2. Systematic breakdown vs. random (pointless) tactics
It can get kind of depressing watching all our friends on Facebook humblebragging about their amazing vacations and posting pictures of their new cars and awesome gifts.

How do you think it makes most of us feel?

The truth is, these people don’t have some magical quality that you and I lack. They are not “naturals.” From knowing a lot of successful people — people who run their own businesses, travel whenever they want, even earn 6- and 7-figure incomes — what they DO have is a systematic way of breaking down problems.

PROBLEM: “What should I do with my life?”

AVERAGE PERSON: “I don’t know…I need to find my passion…I should try a bunch of stuff….I’m reading a lot of blogs….I’m overwhelmed…help! I don’t know what to do! Ahh…I didn’t go to Stanford so there’s no way I can do what  _____ did….The world is unfair….It’s not WHAT you know, it’s WHO you know….Ugh, it’s not like I’m unhappy…really….I’ll do it some day.”

TOP PERFORMER: “All right, I don’t know what I want to do, but I do know a few things I like…so I’m going to find out. How? I’m going to take 5 people out to coffee this month and ask them…Why would they spend time on me? I don’t know yet, but I’m going to try….Oh, in order to get 5 people to say yes, I probably have to email 20 people…What should I email them? Let me google “How to meet busy people”…Hmm, this is an interesting article with the exact networking scripts to use…the first meeting was a little awkward…let me try a different approach on the next one.”

Average performers do what the media says, sending out resume after resume, wondering why nobody responds to them. They latch onto tactics, begging people to tell them what book they read…or what size margins to use on their resumes.

Top performers know there’s a game being played around them, and if they do what everyone else does, they’ve already lost. They deconstruct the game, analyze it, then systematically study how to get what they want, ethically and rapidly. This works for finding a dream job, earning more, traveling more, improving relationships, even working out.

I’ll show you how you can use this approach to take control in your own life.

3. Picking the right things to work on
I remember being in a meeting with about 10 people at my last company, and someone brought up an innocent question: What color should the website be? Within minutes, 10 people were arguing, defending their perspective, and treating the color like it was a world-changing event.

What I learned from this meeting was smart people will attack ANY problem like rabid dogs. The difference between SMART people and EFFECTIVE people is knowing what to tackle.

“I can save $0.50 on saran wrap!” Great, you’re a moron.

This is the perspective of so many people. They are EFFICIENT — tackling whatever’s put in front of them — but not EFFECTIVE in knowing what they should work on in the first place.

We’re cognitive misers. We have limited cognition and willpower. How much of an impact would just ONE big win have on your life — like getting into shape or landing a job you love?

There’s a cost to not being in control

For every day we go by without taking control, what happens?

On that day, nothing.

Over a lifetime, maybe everything.

Just like eating one piece of cake doesn’t affect us in the long term — but eating it every day will make us fat — not taking control holds an invisible grip over us.

Not taking control of productivity means doing less every day than others every single day. It means not flossing or exercising or pursuing that hobby we keep talking about — or trying, half-assed, then giving up.

Not taking control of health means less energy every day and more physical pain, not to mention the intangibles like poorly fitting clothes, less people attracted to you, and lower self-confidence.

Not taking control of relationships/social skills means the phone doesn’t ring on Friday night with people inviting you out. It means settling for who talks to YOU instead of the kind of partner you want. And it means letting your friends and family dictate your decisions instead of being able to confidently say, no, this is what I’m doing.

Finally, not taking control of your career means hating the alarm clock EVERY MORNING. It means being stuck doing something you don’t love — or worse, hate — being underpaid, losing thousands of dollars a year (compounded over a lifetime). Worst of all, it means not living up to your potential.

There’s a real cost to not taking control. And just like investing, the cost actually compounds as we get older.

But if you DO take control, the results ALSO compound.

One $5,000 raise in your 20s, when properly invested, is worth over $1m over a lifetime. Just one raise.

Same for health, productivity…you see what I mean.

So getting us to that first step of taking control is my HIGHEST priority for this year. I’m going to use every tool and technique and example at my disposal to help you get there. Because I know once you do — once you make that first step and instead of waiting for permission, you TAKE control — everything can change.

We’re going to unshackle ourselves from our barriers. We’ll recognize and conquer our invisible scripts. And we’ll take the things we ALREADY want to do, but haven’t….and get more done in the next 4 weeks than we did all of last year.

Along the way, I’m going to show you examples of students I haven’t shared before. (In fact, last year, I didn’t even tell you about literally thousands of students who had success with IWT programs. I have their stories, videos, and even tactical field reports to share with you.)

I’m also opening up a new version of my Dream Job course, Dream Job 2.0, which will help you discover what your dream job is, use natural networking to find people who will help you get it, master your resume and the job interview, and negotiate your salary. The new material is unlike anything you’ve ever seen.

What’s coming your way…

WEEK 1 (next week): Taking control of PRODUCTIVITY and HABITS
WEEK 2: Taking control of SOCIAL SKILLS and NATURAL NETWORKING
WEEK 3: CAREERS

The last week will be private only for my email subscribers. To get on the list, and join 160,000+ other people, click here for instant signup.

So, questions for you:

  1. Is this interesting to you?
  2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story.
  3. What surprised you about today’s post?

Leave a comment below!

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327 Comments

 

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327 Comments on "2013: The Year of Taking Control"

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Lewis Saka
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? – yes, I began to notice areas in my life where I’ve not taken control e.g. health, I eat a lot of the wrong things and don’t exercise 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. – productivity in relation to my blogs. I tend to take time off and let the blog writing lapse. I’d like to get into a routine of updating and maitning the blogs for at least… Read more »
Deborah
Deborah
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes this interests me or I wouldn’t bother to respond.
2. In terms of productivity, I often get overwhelmed by the amount of new material I feel I should be reading or want to be reading and would like to get in a routine (I feel I had one before but have somehow lost it) of reading 3 newspapers today and like 75 pages of a book.
3.Just thinking about my productivity example, I realized I’ve been using correspondence as an excuse to avoid reading.

Stephen
Stephen
3 years 6 months ago
One point about the person in their 20s and planning for failure. I’m also in my 20s and have the same view that come sometime in my 50s, I won’t be able to do that job I do now. Not sure if it is a case of can’t do it, or don’t want to do it yet, but either way I won’t be able to do it. I too am saving for the same point, however I view it as a life choice. At the current rate by the time I hit 58 I’ll be able to stop working *without*… Read more »
steve ward
steve ward
3 years 6 months ago

haha, but that a good thing right? Being able to do that before xyz happens?

Patrick Brophy
Patrick Brophy
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Definitely. While I’m doing well in many areas, I seem to do lots of reading and not enough doing, especially when it comes to exercise. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I’ve lost about 30kg over the past couple of years and I’ve got my healthy eating, avoiding sweets and junk squared away most of the time. But for some inexplicable reason, I’ll go completely nuts for about two… Read more »
jeo
jeo
3 years 6 months ago

Sounds like you’re spending a lot of “control” energy depriving yourself. If you allowed yourself to answer “yes” to “do I really want this chocolate chip cookie” sometimes then it’s a lot easier to answer “no” when you really don’t. Likely a couple of yes votes a month – or even a week – would add up to fewer cookies than your 2 week binge. It’s worked for me, anyway, for 30 years of maintaining a 45# weight loss in my 20s.

Sima
3 years 6 months ago

Sweet cravings relate to lack of grounding, over thinking or worry as all of these are part of the earth element in Chinese medicine. I’d start looking there for emotional triggers.

Julia
Julia
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Very interesting. Health, career and money are definitely areas I’m going to work on this year. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Building habits. I have a lot of hobbies and plans but I find it difficult to start and do these things regularly. I’ll be doing them regularly but then just stop and I’m not sure why. 3. What surprised you about today’s post? Two things: That when you talk about how you’ve met a goal people are defensive. I noticed people don’t seem too interested in… Read more »
Tabitha
Tabitha
3 years 6 months ago

Ramit,
I knew you’d come through! I have spent the last couple weeks focusing on setting up systems and figuring what I can automate/delegate/let go of to make my life more streamlined and less stressful. And of course I thought of you! I’m ready and so happy to have read this post–happy 2013!

Dan @ Casual Kitchen
3 years 6 months ago

What I’ve always loved about Ramit is his ability to see and analyze “proxy conversations” and the minefield conversation above is pure textbook.

A strikingly high percentage of people are walking bags of excuses, fear, resistance and defensiveness. It doesn’t mean that they’re bad people, or mean, or doing it to you on purpose. But if you want to live YOUR life to the best of your ability, you’ve got to see and sidestep these conversation and behavior scripts.

Keep it going Ramit. All the best for a dominating 2013.

Dan @ Casual Kitchen

Connie K
Connie K
3 years 6 months ago

With any luck I’ll get my 20-something children to follow you 🙂

Brett
Brett
3 years 6 months ago

Connie, this may be way off because this line is the only thing I know about you, but this sounds like you’ve given up on yourself. And if that’s true, and that attitude is any influence on them, then they’ll need luck too.

Rosie
Rosie
3 years 6 months ago

Huh, Connie, I didn’t get that impression at all. To me it sounds like you are just saying that you hope they pay attention to Ramit sooner, rather than later, which is not at all a commentary on yourself.

Leam
3 years 6 months ago
Very interesting, thanks! The restatement of obvious points really helps me overcome my natural “dumb” reactions and better hear what is said. This year will be a healthy year so naturally I over-slept due to reading a book late last night and now don’t have time for a morning swim. Health, defined as lower body mass (235), lower blood pressure (130/80, non-medicated), better food intake (Paleo), less stress (Course correct career and work interactions), and better active relationships (Disengage negative mental scripts and expectations). Probably the most surprising thing was hearing that some of your readers are dumb and then… Read more »
Leslie
3 years 6 months ago
Hi Ramit! 1. This is very interesting to me and I can’t wait to read and explore the new material you will present this year! 2. I would like to actually get in shape and be consistent with my exercise and healthy eating. For years, I have been saying I want to do this, but I feel like my health follows the pendulum you spoke about above. I’ll be extremely healthy exercising every day and eating healthy and whole foods for a week and then the next week, I go to the other extreme sitting on the couch and eating… Read more »
Laura Brown
3 years 6 months ago
1. Of course this is interesting to me! I wouldn’t have spent my time reading the full article if it wasn’t! 🙂 2. I want to take control of my career. I’ve been floating from job to job for the past 8 years, and I want to find my dream job, even though I think I know what that is, and make what I’m worth. I’m grossly underpaid at my current job and I hate where I work and what I do. 3. What surprised me most about today’s post was that I saw a lot of my own excuses… Read more »
Ryo Vie
Ryo Vie
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? EXTREMELY interesting. Every year I start off with a bang, knowing it will be my year to change things and secure the BIG wins. Every year, I inch closer, but I still feel that I am not where I need to be. 2. One specific thing — getting more money at my job. I’ve been due for a promotion for over a year, and keep being fed excuses as to why it hasn’t happened yet (not enough new business, my boss has to get promoted first, etc.) This year, heck, this month, that is… Read more »
Andrew
Andrew
3 years 6 months ago
What’s most interesting to me about this article and about a lot of Ramit’s stuff in general is there seems to be a thin line (for a lot of people, myself included) between holding oneself responsible for our failures in a healthy and productive way and devolving into these invisible scripts. That’s something I’ve been trying to conquer/analyze in myself for the last while. It’s definitely hard work to be so constantly self-aware but I agree that it’s the foundation of success in just about everything else over time. I know I tend to fall into traps of “whining” partly… Read more »
Ben
Ben
3 years 6 months ago

1. Very interesting. I JUST had this conversation with my boss (at my Dream Job)

2. I want to do better juggling multiple projects, organizing my overall effectiveness in getting information to my clients.

3. I was surprised about this over all topic. I didn’t think anyone else felt this lack of control in their life.

Cam
Cam
3 years 6 months ago
1. This is very interesting to me. It’s painfully relevant — in different areas — not only to me but also to a close friend. I’m going to direct him here. 2. I want to have more energy, which I think starts with eating better. I don’t need or want to lose weight, I just want to eat the right things. Once I start eating better, it’ll be easier to sleep better. And when I’m well-rested, I can start exercising in the mornings. I’m a morning person by nature and used to wake up and exercise, but I returned to… Read more »
Ryan
Ryan
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? – Yes What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? – My time. I want to do everything. I have a second job because I want experience in that field, I say yes to everything and even though they may be positive things I think that having no downtime takes it’s toll eventually. So I either need to figure out how to go all out all the time or tone it down. What surprised you about today’s post? – Your tone. Obviously YOU’VE been working on your writing because I usually stop… Read more »
Lee
Lee
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes. I’m interested in making a maximum impact, and the strategy of controlling the most important / critical parts of your life and “outsourcing” or “de-prioritizing” everything else is something I’ve never thought of applying to my life, although it obviously parallels one method of running a business. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to take control of my social situation – specifically my ability to meet… Read more »
Zack
Zack
3 years 6 months ago
1. This is extremely interesting to me! 2. I would like to take control of my social skills. I have a lot of people I know, but would really like to do more with planning fun events and getting people together. I have recently developed a routine of getting to the gym regularly, so my next step is to take control of my fuckarounditis I have been prone to so far. I will be finding a great personal trainer within the next two weeks. 3. I was surprised by the detail of the article. I kept agreeing with the content… Read more »
Ben
Ben
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Communications systems and processes. I’m task oriented. I’ve found through experience that I do much better with networking when I connect with people by function of doing something. I’m going to create a communication plan that I can execute on, so that much of my keeping in touch contact feels more like a task and to have a strategy to acquire new and strategic contacts throughout the year. What surprised you about today’s post? How short your paragraphs are! Three substantive things though:… Read more »
S.Sharma
S.Sharma
3 years 6 months ago
Absolutely !Human psychology is very interesting to me. I, as a Physical therapist use it to enhance my treatment outcomes with my clients all the time. So, I love that this post is about looking within. The more authentic I am – the more I can change , the more I can achieve . Thank you for asking the tough questions – as always and being the mirror most of us avoid. One specific thing would be to take control of my health . I took care of my money last year – I am completely debt free today –… Read more »
Dee
Dee
3 years 6 months ago
1. Interesting, of course, and it hits me like a ton of bricks. 2. I want to take control of my finances. (I felt like I needed to write it here to be final… lol.) It’s where it all starts and ends. I wake up in the morning and immediately want to go back to sleep. “I have no energy, I think… I need to eat better… “But I’m a picky eater, I don’t have time to cook…” “I’m to busy with work and life too cook…” “But I have to be busy… I need the money so I can… Read more »
John
John
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit Great post! Is this interesting to you? YES, I want to take control and get a better paying job this year. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I will get a new job this year. I’ve been hating my current job for a while now. I would like to use my degree and get into a career I actually find interesting. I’m used your advise and reached out to guy from a forum I frequent. He’s owned his own PI business for years and has been giving me advise on getting started in the… Read more »
Eve
Eve
3 years 6 months ago
What surprised me? – How long and thought through it was. While most of us try to recover from New Years and are already breaking our resolutions (One last cigarette!), you are starting 2013. with a well laid-out strategy. I was also surprised with how similar the mentioned goals were to my own but then it dawned on me – these are everyone’s goals! (Hell yeah, I’m interested!) One specific goal: I want to pass a certification exam in 30 days. My goal is to create a habit of studying every day for half an hour. I want to use… Read more »
Stacey Morris
3 years 6 months ago

Is this interesting to you? Yes.
What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I need to stop F**cing around and really focus on making my income goal for my copywriting bizness,
What surprised you about today’s post? a) how good you are at holding people accountable and how some people don’t appreciate it; b) that you think some people just don’t know what to do – that’s bs, everyone knows what to do or could easily find out. It’s DOING IT.

Jess
Jess
3 years 6 months ago
This is interesting to me because I am generally pretty self aware with regard to my bad habits but that doesnt mean I have figured out how to break out of them consistently. I have two young kids and I work full time so I have TONS of excuses for why I never find time to work out but the truth is I dont make it a priority and I dont execute. It must be that I dont value it enough but its a vicious cycle of realizing this is one thing I have total control over and makes me… Read more »
Scott Cejka
3 years 6 months ago
Always interesting articles, always a new perspective on old ideas which is what I love. One thing I’d like to change is procrastinating on ideas, even if for one minute. Taking the time to either jot them down, or kicking off an entire project. But not just letting them go or saying I’ll remember them later. For many of those things, there is no later. Even that smallest bit of procrastination can mean the difference between a million dollar idea, a new and exciting relationship, or just one big smile each day. I think one thing that came up and… Read more »
Courtney
Courtney
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Absolutely. I’m interested in personal development and have used many of techniques I’ve learned to greatly improve my life. (Notice: techniques, not tactics) 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I’d like to take control of photography. Before my divorce, I used to have a small photography business but had trouble making time for it due to a miserable job and home life. Now my job situation has… Read more »
Alison
Alison
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes, this is interesting 2. One specific thing I want to take control of is my body’s health. I went from never working out a month ago to 3xs per week. I still need to get to running and eating better so I can do the 5ks without drastically modifying (adding whole regimen to a nonexistent “plan”) my life. There are a ton of benefits but the top for me right now are more successful 5k participation, possibly returning to dance study, sharing more of life with my young son (#1). 3. What surprised me most about this post… Read more »
Sara
Sara
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yep. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My health, specifically by getting into the habit of exercising and making better food choices. I’ve joined a gym and committed to taking one class and one session with my personal trainer per week. I need to ramp it up and make it stick. Improving my cooking skills is next on the menu. Can you help with motivation after taking that first step to change your weight/health/job/life? 3. What surprised you about today’s post? Ramit, I know you’re passionate, but today… Read more »
Aaron
Aaron
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes. You’ve already alluded to a lot of this taking control mindset over the years, and that’s always what has drawn me to IWTY.

2. Taking care of my health, similar to your own weight gain goals, which leads me to #3 and a question.

3. Why/how did removing dairy help you in the weight goals? I’ve come to the conclusion that I have a problem with dairy, despite medical tests saying I should have no issue. How did it affect you?

susan
susan
3 years 6 months ago
I’m trying to take more control of my productivity and I realized, for me personally, that often means needing more inspiration. When I do the same thing day after day, I tend to get in a rut in my comfort zone. My comfort zone is pretty broad though – I freelance, have a baby, travel a ton – but it’s still a zone. So I’m taking a few continuing adult education classes. I’m specifically choosing creative things that can 1) help inspire 2) boost my skills and potentially boost my roster of freelance services I’m also adding 5 servings of… Read more »
Tom P
Tom P
3 years 6 months ago
1. This is very interesting, I have known for a long time now that I have to improve on a great many things, and this is the kind of thing that I can get into. 2. I need to become more social, I find that time and time again I am put into social situations and I am not able to speak, I am afraid that when I do talk I will mess up and look like a fool. I have a lot to say but when I try to speak sometimes things come out all garbled like there are… Read more »
alero
alero
3 years 6 months ago

Hi tom I think 6.6 is a fantastic height some thing positive. u should take advantage of. U would stand out in any gathering I’m sure people would love to talk to you. However I think because u beating urself too much people can read that vibe and will probablly stay away!I decided to talk to u precisely because you mentioned your height!( Big smile)

Lovin
Lovin
3 years 6 months ago

Outstanding post. I saw myself in the “average performer” – using every excuse in the book.

KM
KM
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes, this is interesting! 2. I want to take control of my career, whether it’s climbing my current company’s ladder, moving upwards to a different firm, or changing careers altogether. Or maybe I’ll end up doing all three this year. Regardless, I want to actually make some change in my life as opposed to just complaining about how much I dislike my job for X, Y, and Z reasons. I actually started this mindset in December when I was venting to a former colleague about how my numerous requests for additional training and responsibilities were falling on deaf ears… Read more »
Austin
Austin
3 years 6 months ago
What surprised me about your 2013 call for control post was how overdue it was. Thinking about Gary V and his hustle or Tim Ferriss and his drastic shortcuts made me realize there is no groundwork. The simple idea to take control is lost, preventing most people from following through on the larger goals. Looking back, this topic for 2013 should have come before any of the others. Let me relate a little story about me below. I would like to take control of my relationships with strangers. I have a dream job, I went from 32k to now 115k… Read more »
Chris
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes – quite interesting.

2. Taking control of my sleep schedule. I work from home, don’t set an alarm and often end up working really late at night which wrecks any normal sleep schedule and is starting to take its toll on my health.

3. Using the “I need to figure it out” excuse as a reason to why I haven’t accomplished my goals, or at least started on them. Really guilty at this in several areas of my life.

Sonia
Sonia
3 years 6 months ago
This is fascinating, exciting and right on time for me! Take control of work-life balance: I just relocated because of my job (same employer but will switch work between home office and head office). The work will be straightforward, but I’m in a new town where I do not know many people. I want to rebuild a social circle and meet someone, but with so many new things in my life, it would be easy for me to retreat and stay at home. Also, now that I’m not a satellite employee, I want to become a more integral member of… Read more »
Lauren C.
Lauren C.
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? – Yes, very! 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My career. I am one of those people who is decent at A LOT and a master of nothing, so I’ve always drifted in my career. That needs to end now. I’m tired of saying I don’t know where I’ll be in 10 years career wise simply because I’m not passionate enough about anything to stay with it forever. (yes I do see the psychological barrier in that statement.) I do not have a calling. And that is ok. I… Read more »
Susan
Susan
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Definitely. Taking control of all areas of my life–not just my money–would benefit me in many ways. Understanding the psychology behind why I don’t have control of these areas would be extremely helpful. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I want to improve the relationship between my husband (mildly autistic) and myself (highly emotional) at home. We work very well together, but our family life can get very rocky. 3.What surprised you about today’s post? – It surprised me that people often don’t applaud the improvements of one another, instead… Read more »
Andrew
3 years 6 months ago
This has been a serendipitous read as it is my first time reading your blog (found through link from Tim Ferriss’ blog) Completing 3 tasks this January is my new year’s resolution: track all expenditures and income, complete body transformation, and launch my first direct response product by February 1st. I know I will complete these things since I’ve completed the first two in 2012 and I’m confident I can recreate these habits. Still, I’ve spent the last 2 months in holiday-mode, which makes me feel like a total slacker, eg. much less productivity, terrible eating habits and weight gain,… Read more »
Kam
Kam
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. Want to wake up on time. I’m more productive at night so I don’t beat myself up too much about this. But when I wake up late, I feel like I’m always playing catch-up with my appointments and all that I have to do. I don’t start the day feeling like I’m in control of my time – instead I feel controlled… Read more »
Kelii Moreau
Kelii Moreau
3 years 6 months ago

Always interesting.

This month I am focused on improving my health, starting with a Physical Therapy appointment I have in half an hour. Instead of trying random excursuses, I researched modalities and chose my specific practitioner.

The surprise in the post was realizing that my lack of conviction about exercising just once a week has lead me to a place of minor arthritis in my back. I have become that lame guy in that I thought was always so far away.

Taking back control starts right now.

Jenifer
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes, yes, yes. This is an overarching theme of my life which I keep chipping away at little by little. 2. Bringing in new clients in area I’m interested in working with and designing for. Over the years I’ve taken on whatever client work comes my way but haven’t been happy with the fields I’m designing for. I have found my focus on the design industry I want to go after and work within, but I am having a struggle making that happen. The balance of needing to keep money coming in my doing… Read more »
Julia
Julia
3 years 6 months ago

1. Absolutely interesting to me. It’s the difference between being a dreamer and a doer.

2. I want to take control of my career. I have been making moves, forming connections and tackling projects based on inertia and what’s in front of me. It’s time to plan the moves, seek the connections and pursue the projects that I am passionate about.

3. Surprised by how much I recognized myself in the defensive responses. Someone tells me they lost weight by cutting to x number of calories/day. “Oh, I did that, but it stopped working for me.” Sheesh.

CayBay
CayBay
3 years 6 months ago

Yes, I found your blog entry interesting (though way long)…

I do want to launch into more productivity and I appreciate what you way about our mind (ego) interfering with what our (authentic) self is wanting deeply. Otherwise, my #1 productivity challenge is not losing interest in my projects and following all the way through to completion.

What’s your thinking about our thoughts being “attractive”? eg thinking thoughts of scarcity and poverty will keep us from receiving abundance –

Lastly, I was surprised by the photo of the younger and thinner you.

Here’s the best year ever for all of us!

Trevor
Trevor
3 years 6 months ago
1) Yes, I often feel I would like more control over my life 2) I would like to improve my procrastination habits when it comes to schoolwork. Over the last few months, I’ve been putting off long term projects until Christmas break. Long story short, this made for a very busy and frustrating Christmas Break, and I am still behind. I want to be able to sleep 8 hours a night, and still feel ahead of the game. 3) I expected the post to be all about money – taking control of debt and investments. I was pleasantly surprised to… Read more »
EB
EB
3 years 6 months ago
SO TRUE. I have learned a lot over the last year. And one of the things I have learned is to never talk about my successes, or any experiment currently in progress. People apparently love nothing better than to crap all over your good news, tell you why you’re doing it wrong, and explain all the reasons why your experiments will fail and are dumb. Which of course leaves me feeling like crap. Which I guess is maybe the point? I don’t know. I haven’t told anyone this, but 2012 was one of my best years ever. I expected the… Read more »
Sarah
Sarah
3 years 6 months ago
EB – Congratulations! I appreciate your insight about not disclosing current projects or goals, even to close friends. It seems that to have the courage to take the seemingly counter-intuitive approaches (“Take 5 people out to coffee? Nah, I think it’s better to use that time sending my resume to Craigslist postings.”) necessary to engage the game being played around you, you have to defend yourself against naysayers. If that requires some strategic secrecy, so be it. I’d like to ask you a couple quick questions about your process of launching and evaluating freelance writing projects. Would you mind if… Read more »
Shonni
Shonni
3 years 6 months ago
Very interesting because I’ve told myself that instead of making resolutions that I have history of not keeping, think of one thing I could do to make the biggest impact on my life. That would be taking control. Taking control of my health, finances, career & relationships. I specifically would like to take control of my life by saying no & really meaning it. That’s not just to my friends & family but to myself when I’m on my crazy Target binges, when I’m eating bad food, when I’m spending before saving, when I’m doing a job that I don’t… Read more »
Cody Wheeler
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes. Absolutely. I’ve always had a fascination with human behavior and really love how well you understand it and convey it to us. Its one of the primary reasons I read your shit so much. My favorite part of the negotation course was the psychological lead up. It allowed the end game to become more real. I firmly believe if people would take the time to better understand their own thoughts we would have a lot more success as a society. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say… Read more »
cheetobuzz
cheetobuzz
3 years 6 months ago
well,I should definitely look into this for several reasons… Is this interesting to you?yes,because it actually shows better ways of getting to answers,as opposed to strictly staying within what can predictably occur next. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Even if I did well financially,I have several leeches around me that have already taken steps to get what they can at my expense.I also know some that many look up to,but to really follow their ideas on what I “should”do,I would have to give up a lot of control for haphazard results,and totally be submissive… Read more »
David W
David W
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes
2. Career. Finding the field where I want to make my mark and starting a business
3. I loved the approach you outlined – don’t find that much advice that’s focused on action

Amanda
Amanda
3 years 6 months ago

How much dairy were you eating beforehand? I eat minimal dairy (as in…maybe 2 tablespoons of cream cheese each week) like your example friend, so I’ve only briefly considered that cutting it out entirely would make a difference. Do you think going from minimal to none can have a large impact on weight/health?

Terri
Terri
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? YES. I didn’t even bother with resolutions this year because so many were busts from last year. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My health. I tried hard last year to lose weight, including a couple of different dietary approaches, but none seem to work for long. Paleo/low carb, Spark People, etc. Tried to get a trainer but my gym never returned calls and wouldn’t discuss by email, and I just didn’t follow up. I feel that if I can drop just a couple of sizes and maintain it without… Read more »
Jeremy
3 years 6 months ago
I’ve been reading the habit book you recommended. As I negotiated an extremely lucrative job after 3 years of contracting with a company directly with the senior VP, then 3 months later the company was bought out and everyone laid off so I went back to what I did previously, running my business and consulting. But now realizing the “job” put the control in someone else’s hands, so now working to improve my effectiveness at both my hourly/billable work and my ability to build long term products and services to generate revenue without working every hour for it. Personally adding… Read more »
Tony
3 years 6 months ago

1. very interested to learn how to get rid of the invisible barriers that hold me back!
2. I want to learn how to waste less time on my moments off work when I could be working on my hobby and passion which is electronic music production.
3. the story about the woman who wanted to learn how you developed your physique but became defensive when you shared your story. I guess I have been guilty of this many times…

Kurt
Kurt
3 years 6 months ago
1. YES. 2. Improve my living environment. The house I live in is currently about 9/10 complete and has been in various stages of construction since I moved in six and a half years ago. It’s depressing to live in and it’s a situation wholly of my own making. It became clear just how much of a problem this was when I realized how much my mood improved every time I traveled for work and checked into a hotel room. Just sleeping and living, even temporarily, in a space that is complete, with no half finished floor or light bulbs… Read more »
channing
3 years 6 months ago
Absolutely this is interesting. I have also arrived at the conclusion that – for the most part – personal behavior modification is where the action’s at. It’s a fraught arena, but you get immense payoff from every victory there. This year is the year of either making my consulting business work, or return to traditional employment. In order to know that I gave it my all, I need to get over the “sprint then snooze” rhythm I’ve been stuck in. At this point I can identify specific habits to tackle so that my at-home work engagement is higher, but I… Read more »
Abigail
Abigail
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? – Yes. Very! What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. – I want to be in control of my career. Its very important to me, because then the finance, health and relationship areas of my life will get better. My issue is that my CV, (which catalogues past work) looks AMAZING! However I’m now about to start a freelance career for the first time, after being a mature grad student,… Read more »
Nadia
Nadia
3 years 6 months ago

1. Absolutely, these topics are so important and have been themes of mine for a while.

2. I want to take control of my money. There is a two-fold situation with this one. I am currently working on growing a side business of my own. I’ve taken on some debt in order to do this. In 2013, I want to eradicate my debt and grow my side business. I want to be able to enroll in the Earn $1K program.

3. The editing of the videos. I love this new feel! Get it, Ramit.

Christine
Christine
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Yes! 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to make more money this year and pay off half of my debt. I started a new business and I don’t have good systems in place and my productivity is suffering. 3.What surprised you about today’s post? I have always resisted the idea of “taking control” — it seemed rigid and limiting to me. I see now how that was… Read more »
J
J
3 years 6 months ago
Q: Is this interesting to you? A: Yes, but then your posts always are interesting to me. Q: What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. A: I want to take control of my health. I am in ok shape. I look good, but feel meh. I could easily be in fantastic shape without a lot of effort, so I don’t understand why I do nothing at all! I wanted to become certified in yoga, for… Read more »
Jeff
3 years 6 months ago
1. Interesting : Yes your perspectives are funny, acute and on point. (Lose the personal haberdasher, waste of fucking money.) 2. Take control of my inability to break away from posting to news threads on the internet which interest me. Getting thumbs up from random assholes should begin to feel like a thumb up my ass because I am truly wasting my time being glib, brilliant, pithy and occasionally witty. Need to divert this energy to investment strategies, long walks and more random acts of kindness. 3. Surprising : That I received and read your post. It will be even… Read more »
Mark
Mark
3 years 6 months ago
– I loved this post. Thank you so much, Ramit. This is exactly what my focus is for 2013; it’s pretty interesting to me that once I decided taking control of my life is my focus this year, that I got this in my email. – Within productivity, 0I want to be excellent at working efficiently in the right order. I sometimes find myself working on the wrong things that don’t get me where I want to go. They’re good things, just not the right things that will help me accomplish my goal. – It was as if you were… Read more »
Andrea
Andrea
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Yup…this is one area where I’ve kind of played around with looking at my invisible scripts and such, but I’ve never really gone all in. This year I want to really put my self in control and put my own bs behind me. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. My job used to be great and I really enjoyed it…but its changed and now it sucks. It’s time to step up and… Read more »
Val
3 years 6 months ago
Interesting, yes. I need to take control of my daily activities. I am currently on the road, traveling every 4-6 days to another location, so it is very difficult to create routines. Depending to where I am staying (sometimes friends, sometimes couchsurfing, sometimes hotels) and how I am traveling (sometimes quickly by train, sometimes very relaxed by hitchhiking) I can’t plan that much either. So sometimes it’s just “easier” to forget about the things I still “should” do and drink another coffee, have another chat, or read another chapter… Surprising: How similar the comments are 😉 We are not so… Read more »
page
3 years 6 months ago

You hit the nail on the head about the difference between SMART people and EFFECTIVE people being knowing what to tackle.

I started my 2013 goals LAST WEEK by setting blocks of time where I prioritize different things I need to accomplish. This still allows flexibility but keeps me focused on the big picture. Thanks for the reminder and a great post to start the new year.

Arm L
Arm L
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? – Yes it is! In fact it really points to the things I really want to do this new year. I can have head start with this. I will read this again What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. – Last year I am so stressed with what’s happening with my life. Debts, bills, and work. Soon I became less productive because I don’t know what to do or what… Read more »
Marc
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? – Heck yeah. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. – Income. Over 2012 I’ve doubled my income vs. 2011. However, in 2013, I want to not just increase 2012’s income by 100%, but earn it on my own terms: 1) 50% less time 2) Location Independence This will free me up to pursue things that bring me happiness. Travel. Martial Arts. Learning to play a musical instrument. Working on… Read more »
Elisa C.
3 years 6 months ago
FANTASTIC POST!! 1.) This topic is so interesting and I can’t wait to see what you’ve got in store for us in the next 4 weeks. Thanks to you I’ve been reading Charles Duhigg’s book The Power of Habit and have realized that by letting my habit of running 4 times a week go because I just didn’t have enough time in my day, (I’ve been working 7 am-10pm since September), that’s why everything else has basically gone to hell. Losing control of this one keystone habit has derailed my productivity, motivation, essentially my whole life (or so it feels).… Read more »
Karl
3 years 6 months ago
1. Actively working to change my habits for productivity is a huge goal of mine this year, and reading your blogs on actually taking action is a nice kick in the pants to get moving when I don’t feel like it. You take a high level approach, and I love that. 2. One specific aspect of productivity I want to reign in, is the amount of time I spend writing each week. I have a tendency to put it off by playing video games, suddenly requiring food, or slipping into a catatonic ‘power nap’ that lasts 3 hours. To tackle… Read more »
tochi brown
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Very much so. So much has been said by so many about how to interrupt negative scripts/inner critic/mind movies/internal stories, yet we don’t think it applies to ‘us’ (“My situation is unique!”). “Uniquitis” disease. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. (I can’t believe I’m writing this on a public blog. Aaaarrrrghhhh! LOL) Okay, one specific thing I want to to work on is finally taking full accountability… Read more »
Ren Ying Lim
Ren Ying Lim
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Dear Ramit, to use your word that keeps cropping up in your videos – this is fascinating. I wondered if you were psychic, because this came at the exact same moment in my life where my sense of control has become – literally – non-existent. Most of the things you said were freakishly applicable to my situation — and I believe to many others’ as well. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why.… Read more »
Dana
Dana
3 years 6 months ago
I am well past my 20’s and thankfully have employed many of your techniques for debt reduction, automatic saving and such. Now, at 40, I find myself dreading my work day. I have a good job that pays well and is in a challenging industry but the work environment is toxic and I find myself cringing at the thought of returning to work after the holidays. The hardest part is I don’t know what else I would do with my career if not this. I have several “not so invisible scripts” that I play and I am committing to tackling… Read more »
Vivienne
Vivienne
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes, definitely. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? The strange thing with me is that when I really get angry with myself and my circumstances, then I take action to change it, and I’m usually successful. But when things are going good (or at least tolerable), I tend to coast. I also have an extremely hard time asking people for help with advice or anything else, so it would take a lot for me to email 20 people and actually set up meetings with five of them to… Read more »
Umar
Umar
3 years 6 months ago
1) It is very interesting topic for me because I have been fighting with these issues all my adult life. Developing habits that make me more productive has been a lifelong challenge. Like how to get ready in the morning with least amount of hassle or how to organize my work during the day, so I don’t waste the best part of it surfing the internet. How to motivate myself to continuously improve my skills, professional and social. How to make sure that exercising 4 times a week doesn’t take a back seat to everything else that is going. Should… Read more »
Nerea
Nerea
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Absolutely. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. It’s hard to narrow it down to ONE specific thing that I want to take control of. I guess ‘it’ would have to be important enough to have a domino effect on the idea of controlling all areas of your life. For me being a perfectionist is a real shackle and often I won’t get projects completed because I talk myself out… Read more »
Kristie
3 years 6 months ago
I feel pretty in control with most areas of my life job, health, finances. What I am going to work on this year is making lifelong girlfriends in the city I now live in. I moved about 3 years ago from my hometown where I have a 10 really close girlfriends but have begun to feel the void of not having great girlfriend that I can go do things with in my new city. I work from home so no work friends and I’m single which means I have met and made a lot a of male friends but not… Read more »
Keith
Keith
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes…I am an “Extreme Reach” goal setter so this post speaks to me. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I want to control the de-motivating thoughts in my head. I have failed so many times to follow through on opportunities. When starting a new project, I will start to break things down and quickly feel overwhelmed by the sheer number of tasks and the de-motivation sets in. From that point on, it’s just a matter of thinking up the specific reasons to stop working on the current opportunity.… Read more »
JLo
JLo
3 years 6 months ago
-Yes, for sure. -This might sound strange, but SLEEP. I think at the moment lack of sleep is my biggest productivity killer. I’ve had a ton of freelance work lately (yay, in part thanks to your strategies), but I’m running ragged and have been staying up crazy hours of the night to keep up/get ahead. It’s turning into a cycle where my productivity is actually down during the day because I’m so tired, and then I stress about it and have a hard time sleeping at night. When I’m rested, I’m so much more alert and can accomplish my work… Read more »
David
David
3 years 6 months ago
Hi, 1.Is this interesting to you? Yes. I have regained control over several areas in the last year (i.e. employment, finances) but have lost control in others (i.e. fitness, staying in touch with distant friends). 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. There are limited ‘free’ hours in the day, and I feel I’ve over-subscribed to financial, motivational and developmental newsletters and the like. I’d like to refine (control) my reading and developments, WITHOUT jeopardizing… Read more »
Margaret
Margaret
3 years 6 months ago

Ramit, I am definitely interested. One thing I need to do–and I’ve needed to do it for years, is to split up with my toxic husband. I’m scared since I haven’t been on my own in 20 years, but I have to do it if I’m going to be a healthy active person.

I was surprised about the invisible scripts. Yes, people ask questions about your success to make excuses for themselves. I never saw that before.

Jane
Jane
3 years 6 months ago

I split with my toxic ex of 13 years, three years ago. It was scary and I had never lived on my own. It was one of the best decisions I ever made and although I can’t get my 30’s back, I’m looking forward to new challenges and successes.

LaToya
LaToya
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes. Enough to even make me respond. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I will be improving my health and productivity this year. Yes. I will. I’ve been waiting on your words of wisdoms for this year and I am motivated to put action into my dreams. My husband and I are trying to get pregnant this year and for a woman that’s looks like a model without trying…… Read more »
SW
SW
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes 2. To take control of building and creating new relationships instead of waiting for a friend to invite me out to some place where there will be new people to meet with an easy way to be introduced. Also, I’d like to take control of my Daily Default Schedule so that I tend to automatically gravitate towards activities that work on my long term goals (smarter, funnier, have more friends). I have introduced semi regular workouts to my life, but have been unsuccessful in working on the other goals in a regular fashion. 3. taking control of relationships… Read more »
Margaret
Margaret
3 years 6 months ago

You’ve got an Insider’s Kit newsletter? Your newsletters are always valuable, Ramit.

Rosa
Rosa
3 years 6 months ago
Yes! Bring it! I am going to take control of my health. I already have a personal trainer and this year I am going to hire a nutritionist. I believe that this might be my keystone habit that will lead to success in other areas of my life such as career since my weight has been an issue I’ve grappled with since childhood. I am always surprised that you offer so much quality information for free, but what really caught my attention was the uncanny feeling that you had been sitting in on a private conversation between my closets allies… Read more »
J
J
3 years 6 months ago

I am doing reasonably well in life. I run a film company that I secured significant investment in, and yet… Despite all manner of strategies when my Alarm clock goes in the morning, I ignore it to the point of self sabotage.

Filippos
Filippos
3 years 6 months ago
Happy New Year to all! Dear Ramit, I have been reading your emails for less than a year but they always surprise me positively! Communicating and trying to change our psychology is for me the number one thing that people should do in every area of our lives and our economy and I am glad you bring this on top so often. I do have some questiosn that I would like to talk with you thought since I really like your style and work but I do not think that altering our psychology in a permanent way is not an… Read more »
Filippos
Filippos
3 years 6 months ago

Dear Ramit,

I came back to check if you answered my first post and although you did answer posts that followed mine I did not see any reply here. Did you miss it or I did not get an answer on purpose?

Best regards!

Zyon
Zyon
3 years 6 months ago
A couple of things that stood out to me. “Yet when we see someone JUST LIKE US, doing it successfully, our barriers instantly surface to hold us back from changing?” A lot of times we think that successful people have found the magic key to success or that success comes easily to that person, but they are JUST LIKE US. I’ve gotten so angry at people when they ask me what I do to get fit so I tell them exactly what I do and they say “Oh you’re on the [insert fad diet that they hate] diet. Oh that’s… Read more »
An
An
3 years 6 months ago
Awesome. One specific thing I want to take control of: my writing career. In the kind of writing I do, the model is totally focused on other people — yes, you do the writing and revising, but then you send it out for other people to publish or not publish, other people to distribute, other people to set the price points on and determine schedules for. I’m going to test various models of distributing content and generating income, be they serializations and subscriptions, pay-what-you-ant models, or virtual tip jars on free content. And I’m going to generate and test ideas… Read more »
Eliza
Eliza
3 years 6 months ago
I really appreciate this post – both the content & the timing. I don’t know what you are selling – but i’m pretty sure i’ll buy because this speaks to me at a really deep level. The hardest part for me to come to terms with was that I was responsible for everything that wasn’t working out in my life. A few years ago I had a great life, a rich life even, all built on my own hard work & a climb-every-mountain attitude. Sure there were tons of areas of improvement – i mean who doesn’t want more money,… Read more »
Nikki
Nikki
3 years 6 months ago

I want to take control of my schedule and be able to prioritize the most important activities.

Emily
Emily
3 years 6 months ago

Spot on! I read this and you held a mirror up to my face. When I was single and dating one of my mantras ws, “the right guy won’t have excuses on why he can/can’t do something. If he wants to do something bad enough, he’ll do it with no excuses” Little did I know, or realize until this email, that the same goes for me. I don’t have to have it all in one lump sum, I just have to be willing to get off my ass and DO it and the rest will come.

Liza
Liza
3 years 6 months ago

I was so surprised by the costs of complacency!
Totally appreciate how you’ve spelled it out so frankly – inspiring!
Also a little shocked(motivated) by the white-knuckle vibe of the IWT readers in the first video.

ejustice
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes 2. I want to take control of my earnings. I work two jobs, one is a salary/healthcare providing job 40/hrs a week. The other is my farm, which is what I want to do full-time in the next year or two. I asked for a raise at my salaried job, prompted partially by your previous posts on negotiating raises and earning more money. However, my negotiation did not go very well and I did not get the raise I felt I deserved. So, I’m open to re-negotiating with a job I like or finding a different job to… Read more »
Mia
Mia
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. I generally am very happy and feel in control of my life, but there are always areas that could use fine tuning or improvement, plus always new projects to take on. I do think that this post and the issue of ‘feeling out of control’ is something that will resonate for most of my peers and people in my age group (20 to early 30 something year olds). I know many of my friends feel like they are drowning/overwhelmed, and don’t know how to get out of it. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC… Read more »
Marisol
Marisol
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes, it is. I’m looking forward to following-up this entry and see what I can achieve after four weeks 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I want to take control of my intent. I know your blog is the answer to my problems (most entries speak to me so so directly), I feel so motivated after reading your emails, but that doesn’t mean I take the next step. There’s always a better time to do this, or I’ll figure it out when I have some spare time (emotional… Read more »
Delia
Delia
3 years 6 months ago
This is very interesting material. One thing I want to take control of this year is finding my dream job. I majored in Hotel Administration and will be graduating in December. I only picked this major because I thought I needed the background knowledge to be able to interior design hotels. WRONG! Now I know more about my interests and want to hone in on them so when I graduate I’m not working at a job I hate simply to pay loans off. I think the part that surprised me about today’s post is the invisible scripts that show up… Read more »
Sharon
Sharon
3 years 6 months ago
1. YES, I am definitely interested! 2. I want to work on my social skills–in particular, being able to have a conversation with anybody. I know I’m shy, but I have a great built-in topic with my job (it’s pretty spectacular). But once I’m past that topic–or if it’s not appropriate for the situation–I tend to clam up or frantically reach for something, anything, to talk about, and things just get awkward. 3. Frankly, I’m surprised at my reaction to this post. I thought I was more-or-less in control of my life (working at my dream job, in a solid… Read more »
Brian
Brian
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes. Very interesting. I have never been in debt and always had a bit of savings. But after moving twice and changing jobs in the last six months, I am now living paycheck to paycheck. It was quite a shock to me when my bank alerted me last week that a pending automatic payment was going to overdraw my checking account. For the first time, I realized that some things were a bit out of control. 2. I want to take control of my finances and earn more money. Specifically, about $1K/month extra. I found a dream job last… Read more »
andi
andi
3 years 6 months ago
1- Is this interesting to you? Yes, in the past I have read self help books fanatically- waiting for that perfect system that makes my path clear. It’s time to DO and TEST. This week I’m actually taking all the self help books and getting rid of them. 2- What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I’m addicted to productivity and time management. I’ve written a great class that I want to convert into a… Read more »
Paul
Paul
3 years 6 months ago
1. I am definitely interested. Since I’ve gotten great results from IWT material so far with getting an awesome new job with a huge pay increase and automating finances, it’s time to tackle the next things on my list. 2. Next, I will finally become fluent in Russian this year. For the past 1.5 years I’ve hovered at the same level without improvement, my wife and I can always revert to English because her English is so excellent. We are great at keeping a workout schedule but terrible at keeping up momentum for studying. 3. It was surprising to realize… Read more »
jay
jay
3 years 6 months ago
I have been working strategically the last few weeks to become as effective as possible. My focus the last few years has been on Efficiency, my staff calls it the “E” word because I was always using it. However, I have come to realize my success depends on effectiveness not efficiency. My new focus is on effective processes. When all is said and done we want to be effective. Relationships for example: Do I want to be efficient and potentially miss out on something special because of haste? or have an effective process that will lead to fulfillment? good luck… Read more »
Meg
Meg
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? – Yes. I’ve been struggling for over a year with getting control of my career path and have become less productive at my current job as a result of being overwhelmed with internal negative scripts. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. – getting a new job. I’ve been telling myself for a year that I’ll never get it done. And I haven’t. What surprised you about today’s post? –… Read more »
rkt88edmo
rkt88edmo
3 years 6 months ago

1.Is this interesting to you? – hells yes

2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Studying for the coddamn CPA exam

3.What surprised you about today’s post? You didn’t sell a course harder than simply name dropping dreamjob2.0

Alyssa
3 years 6 months ago
““I can save $0.50 on saran wrap!” Great, you’re a moron.” – Effing HIlarious Ramit. Yes, absolutely interesting, love this stuff. You’re just getting better and better. I need to take control of my career. I’m an acupuncturist in Santa Monica. I opened my own practice 1 year and 9 months ago. Although it continues to grow and gain momentum, I find that I like this job, not love it. In order to explore a more satisfying and extraordinary existence while still including acupuncture, as of lately I’ve been creating side businesses of on-set acupuncture, in-home acupuncture and acupuncture retreats… Read more »
mark
mark
3 years 6 months ago

The only thing I want to care of is making more money in my side business. I know what I have to do. But getting a few tips from Ramit and taking action are what all of us shitheads need to do.

I have a regular job as well and I take damn good care of myself. I workout daily, eat nutritiously every meal. I’m not kidding. My finances are fine. I don’t overspend.

My friends never did what they wanted, but I knew i had to.

Thanks Ramit

Mark in getting colder Canada

Veronic
Veronic
3 years 6 months ago
Here’s a story for you…in my last year of schooling during my 3rd degree (ya, I said 3rd) I got pregnant with twins, so needless to say I couldn’t start working right away. So it’s been a year since their birth, have a mountain of debt…I mean Mount Everest mountain (CC, line of credit, student loan) that I can’t afford to pay…still not working…not because I don’t want to but because I can’t afford child care. My relationship has fallen through..went on an extended vacation to my parents across the country…ex wants me back “home” for the babies but can’t… Read more »
Alex
Alex
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? -Yes, I like reading about how to be effective. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. -I’d like to start learning to program by finishing my 2nd online class, reading an introductory college book, and implementing personal projects – by dedicating at least 90 minutes a day towards these endeavors. What surprised you about today’s post? -The difference between effective and efficient is choosing what you do rather than getting… Read more »
Kevin
Kevin
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit, I discovered you a few years ago through the Pickup Podcast with AJ and Jordan. Since then, I’ve left my job and built my own business. I moved out of a crummy apartment and into a nice one. In terms of career and finances, I feel like I’m right where I want to be. What I haven’t taken control of is dating (ironic considering how I discovered you…) I had the guts to go to my employer and say, “I’m not returning to this job”, but I don’t have the guts to say “hi” to girls I see when… Read more »
James
3 years 6 months ago

1 – ABSOLUTELY. Like many people, I have let invisible rules, thoughts, intentions get between me and my goals. I’m a smart guy and I even know what to do but can’t seem to get there.

2 – I want to make fitness a lifestyle change and first priority this year.

3 – Your message spoke directly to me. You’ve either sniffed out your target audience so well that it feels personal or have found a universal desire that communicates to many.

Kirsten
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I would like to take control of my energy levels. A year ago, I managed to slam my head into the inside of a bus and came away with a concussion that left me with persistent tinnitus and hypersomnia. I’m dependent on various chemical stimulants to get through the day if I want to stay upright for more than four hours at… Read more »
Amy
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? This is definitely interesting. There are several areas where I’ve been incredibly good at taking control of my life… Past addictions, health, nutrition, career. But in some areas, I still really suck at control, I’m interested to see what’s different about those parts of my life that make them more uncontrollable for me. 2. One specific thing you want to take control of? One is hard. I think I have to go with social skills, with finances coming in a tight second. I think I do fine socially, but the truth is, I’m quiet,… Read more »
aileen
3 years 6 months ago

Ramit, you’ve hit the nail on the head. I *used to be* a top performer but have slipped into complacency and have become merely average. I still get awesome clients that I brag about. It all looks good on FB, but I know the truth! I am becoming a lazy ass and totally directionless. Please help! The only thing I’ve been in control of lately is my social life but, dude, drinking and flirting is not enough for the ambitious go-getter soul buried inside of me.

Matt T
Matt T
3 years 6 months ago
So, questions for you: 1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. This is the Ramit “year of ____” that I am most excited for. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Time management. I “putz” away too much time between facebook, blogs, and I don’t even know what. Too many times I have no idea where all my time went at the end of the week when I’d like to kick butt at work while also carving out time to be fit and to go back to school. If I can find and properly manage… Read more »
MarkF
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? **of course it is! 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. **from my own viewpoint, it is not really about resolutions, tactics, or techniques. it’s about basics. most of us know 80%-90% of what we need to do to get control of our lives. and for the rest, we have people like yourself and the internet in general. but for now, i’m getting back to controlling the basics. you can’t… Read more »
Casey
Casey
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to control my work habits to increase productivity to be more consistent. I have up and down days and up and down weeks. Ex Last week was a down week at work so there wasn’t a lot of pressure to get anything done, so I didn’t. I could have gotten a bunch of things done for work, set up a… Read more »
Brad
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? In a way. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to take control of my income by building up a freelance writing career on the side and turn that into a lucrative career (or continue side career) writing feature stories about people. Basically, I want to tell interesting stories and get paid to do it. 🙂 What surprised you about today’s post? Nothing really surprised me. Just that… Read more »
Rachel
Rachel
3 years 6 months ago

Hi Ramit,

1. I am definitely interested. I have started taking control of the health area of my life and am excited to watch it run over into other aspects.
2. Specifically, I want to take control of my career – by owning my job search and overcoming invisible barriers.
3. The full-circle nature of today’s post surprised me. I enjoyed it.

Rachel

Camilo Oliveira
3 years 6 months ago
1) Yes, sure! 2) The money I get from my work – my daily job and my freelances. Being in control of money gives me peace of mind to planning interesting things to do. I can say yes to some good places my friends asks me to go, or can travel more times in a year (and meet new people from these places), or get some courses or good material to learn more on things I want. I like my job and want to be better and earn more money from it – from my employer and my personal clients.… Read more »
Kacie
Kacie
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Most definitely! 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity”–tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. Social skills. I have discovered that most, if not all, of my friendships were formed because the other person approached me first. I’m usually the one being asked to do stuff and I want to switch that this year. I want to get more comfortable asking people out and creating mentor-like relationships with my professors. I want to be more active… Read more »
Teshaya
Teshaya
3 years 6 months ago
Hi, I am 20 and I am building my company on paper : ) because I don’t know yet what my business will be. I think that is because of a “brainstorming” in my head and this is what I want to control and by this steps i have no doubts i will make it done. Is this interesting to me? ” Top performers know there’s a game being played around them, and if they do what everyone else does, they’ve already lost. They deconstruct the game, analyze it, then systematically study how to get what they want, ethically and… Read more »
Luna
Luna
3 years 6 months ago
Your story totally hit home… I got so frustrated when my apartment manager didn’t let me hang out in the public office space a few days ago because they were closing. There were some family members I didn’t want to see visiting my house (long story), so I wanted someplace warm to hang out for an hour or so. When I walked in a mailman was leaving and said they were closing; I said I just wanted to sit in the office area for a little while. The manager repeated that they were closing. I huffily replied “FINE” then trekked… Read more »
K00kykelly
K00kykelly
3 years 6 months ago
I know the feeling with the coats… I’ve made some online purchases that didn’t work out while busy and they just loom around if you don’t just accept that you’re taking a loss due to stupidity on them. Now I seek out places with long return policies.  Zappos is great because even if it is a bit more expensive I can take my time with trying the shoes on around the house and return them up to a year later. For the coats, you can still sell them on ebay or consign them. At least then you know someone will… Read more »
Maria
Maria
3 years 6 months ago
1) This is definitely interesting to me. 2) One SPECIFIC thing that I want to take control of is the future direction of my career. I am about 18-24 months from finishing a Ph.D. and after that I will need to find a “real” job. I love doing research and I love teaching, but a lot of academic posts look like a slow descent into madness, and I’m not really sure what sorts of jobs are available in industry, if I should do a PostDoc position, or pretty much anything else. I plan to address this by developing one new… Read more »
lhamo
lhamo
3 years 6 months ago

You should run, not walk, over to Karen Kelsky’s website http://www.theprofessorisin.com to get a ton of free advice (and paid consulting, if you want it) on how to manage either pursuing or leaving an academic career. She is a bit like Ramit’s long-lost older sister for the academic crowd. No-nonsense advice on how to survive or leave academia from someone who has been there (she was a tenured faculty chair when she decided to leave it all for personal reasons — great post about it on her blog).

Jess H.
Jess H.
3 years 6 months ago

Seconding the Karen Kelsky recommendation. Or as I like to call her, Karen “Ramit” Kelsky.

steve ward
steve ward
3 years 6 months ago
1) Is this interesting to you? Yes! mainly because there scripts in my current system that i dont understand or can deal with. It as if im in a forest and i keep picking the poison food and not understanding why. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. To develop a stable income, in the past weather it be a job or a business they all seemed to fall apart. Although bastard (=P) you… Read more »
Missy
Missy
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Absolutely. I was planning to get things back in order after the holidays (I know, I know, putting things off). After discovering your blog and following a lot of your advice last year, I was able to land a new job that I love, but over the last 5 months I’ve stagnated, stopped reading, learning, and progressing. I’ve already identified a few small things I need to do to help me get back on track. For example, after I moved I lost my laptop charger, so I don’t use my computer when I’m at, which… Read more »
Naomi
Naomi
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Oh yeah! 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My social life. Although I was taught this lesson a while ago, it was over the last year or two that I learned that the life I was living was EXACTLY the one that I chose for myself. I moved to another city 2 years ago and have spent countless hours longing for old friendships. As time passed, it became clear to me that those old frienships weren’t all that great. My friendships were based on commonalities like work, church, alumni groups,… Read more »
YK
YK
3 years 6 months ago
Definitely interesting. I think my current productivity need is completing the professional training I’ve already bought and paid for. (It’s home-based go-at-your-own pace learning. Like an idiot, I’m just letting it sit. I know it’s foolish, but for some reason I haven’t gotten around to ACTUALLY DOING IT.) I was surprised by that guy who assumed he’d be unemployable after twenty years. Why? Is experience worth nothing? Is he incapable of learning new skills? Can’t he work as a contractor, or own his own business? (I mean a business where he employs other people.) What’s this guy thinking?
Catherine Renee'
3 years 6 months ago
1.) I enjoy reading what you write Ramit. It is quite refreshing and great reminders as well as learning. 2.) I have several courses I have purchased over the past few months that I have not put my focus upon. I am in a position for the next month whereby I have the time to complete and implement these courses which will greatly improve my cashflow. I want to take control over my time to complete these courses and to challenge myself to look at the discomfort and beliefs that I know will be uncovered which are not serving me… Read more »
Jess H.
Jess H.
3 years 6 months ago
This year, I want to take (increase?) control of my career. Things are going incredibly well – in fact, using Ramit Techniques, I turned a consulting gig into a six-figure contract and have hired eight people to work for me – but I want to make sure that I’m in control of my next steps instead of having them be in control of me. Specifically, I want to sign two new contracts this year so I have a more diversified client base. I also want to hire someone who can assist me with the one mission-critical part of the business… Read more »
Aubrey Williams
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Absolutely. I particularly liked the idea that you don’t have to be in control of everything to be in control, but you do have to be active and trying something instead of giving up or just researching endlessly. Do something! Get out there! Talk to someone! Try something! So few people actually try that you will set yourself apart by this alone. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I… Read more »
Jackie
Jackie
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes, very interesting. A fresh take on tired new year’s articles on resolutions. It is definitely time to take control! 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. -I want to take control of setting goals. I get too caught up in the “big picture” that I get too overwhelmed, and forget the basic fundamentals of breaking goals down. I also feel like I cant get specific enough or… Read more »
Matthew Rayfield
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Heck yeah! I’m always interested in improving myself. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Waking up early! I’m excited that it is something you’ve mentioned explicitly. Even though I don’t sleep too much, the feeling of waking up later than I want to starts the day on a sour note. Something I’d definitely like to fix. 3. What surprised you about today’s post? I’m surprised that I read it all! These big long posts about new programs I usually skim. But today, I sat and consumed the whole… Read more »
RJ
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yeah, definitely. I’ve made some very specific new years resolutions so I’m working on building the discipline to do them. 2. One specific thing to take control of. I want to run a marathon by the end of the year, so in order to do that, I need to run. A lot. Right now, the step I need to take is to begin running three times a week. So tomorrow, Thursday, I will run. Then on Saturday, and on Tuesday. I want to take control of when I run. 3. What surprised me? Just… Read more »
Maxime
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I want my new business to actually start. I founded UPO International in April 2012 with my partner. We are creating the first food drying eco-industrial plant in Cameroon which is called UPOCAM. There is so much things to do I tend to choose the easiest ones and avoid the most difficult ones. Of course, I need to do the latter so my business can actually start. I clearly can be more productive (or procrastinate less) but I think I also… Read more »
Kelci Crawford
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? F@#$ YES. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. My freaking career. I used to work as a caricature artist until I realized it was one of the most well-paid but unsatisfying job out there. So I quit and I’m working two part-time jobs until I get into my next job. I got a few freelance gigs which have helped pay for unexpected bills, and I would like to grow… Read more »
Annika S
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting? – Absolutely! I decided 2 weeks ago that this year (actually 18 months) is all about taking control of my life, and achieving location independence in my work. I already have a plan, and I have a feeling that using your material to discover my invisible scripts will be invaluable! 2. One specific thing I am taking control of over the next 18 months? My job. I intend to become self-employed and location independent 3. What surprised me? – the fact that the coming material is SO relevant to my already existing goal. The past year… Read more »
Wesley
Wesley
3 years 6 months ago
1. All of your articles are interesting to me. Especially the barrier/invisible script focused ones. 2. I want to take control of how I respond to people. Today I have been living at a drug rehab for 8 months. Each day being surrounded by people who need help, but are so frustrating creates a negative response out of me. By responding with care and compassion we will both be able to get what we want. I want to help influence and change their lives for the better. They want to see that someone cares and looks past the immediate, seeing… Read more »
Jane
Jane
3 years 6 months ago

You can do it! May you have continued success with your recovery.

Frank
Frank
3 years 6 months ago
1. Very interesting 2. One thing to take control of– salary and income. Tearing apart the nitty-gritty of my field to find the niche jobs that I want to be a part of. Finding a mentor whom I love and want to work for. 3. Not so much surprised, but I loved the story about the return and how being mad at others is often being mad at yourself, and the story about color and the difference between smart people and effective people. You always touch upon these themes and each time you do it with a different context the… Read more »
Soma
Soma
3 years 6 months ago
This was actually fascinating. I’ve caught myself saying the whole bit about who you know often, and find myself knowing only the same people I knew a year ago. I just had a long conversation with a friend about what’s “wrong” with me that I can’t overcome the barriers that I have. I can only pick one thing to work on? 🙂 I’ll go with the most visible, I would love to improve my networking skills. I work in a high end field, and having grown up in a middle class immigrant family, I think I have a HUGE blocking… Read more »
Pauline
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. Best post in a long time. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I am so in control of my money and finances that I can see the lack of control in other areas of my life, and looking at other people. I can’t stand their excuses ”I work too hard for a side job”, ”I’m in college, how can I work part time? Scholarships? They are so… Read more »
Worth It
Worth It
3 years 6 months ago
Somehow I didn’t get how “after writing about psychology for 8 years, I’m lucky to be sane” gives a good reason to use demeaning names for some of your readers. One thing that has given me serious second thoughts about enrolling in any of your courses, despite noting plenty of brilliant insight is what comes across to me as a quickness to be abusive of others. I certainly understand that people can cause frustration and be clueless. So I wonder how the name calling serves you, how it fits into your system. Is it a way of screening out people… Read more »
Rachael
Rachael
3 years 6 months ago
You’re right. Whenever I recommend Ramit’s stuff to my friends, I warn them about this: He’s a jerk about a lot of things. I also think you’re misreading. Ramit is very, very snarky and sarcastic. But — and this is a big but — he’s almost never mean, at least for my tastes. I don’t read him as kicking people when they are down — and in fact, I find this site is one of the more respectful to people in genuinely hard circumstances. He doesn’t pretend that this is a purely meritocratic society and we all have our destinies… Read more »
Steve
Steve
3 years 6 months ago

Is This Interesting.
Yep. Great discussion on raising awareness to scripts, identifying them, managing them going forward. Curious how many a day kick in.

Take control item. My biggest scripts and calling BS on others’

Biggest surprise. How common these factors are for everyone.

Nigel
Nigel
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit – this was like a smack upside the head. You have provided me so much to think about – and I’m not a 20 something – I’m a 60 something. (It’s never too late, right?) I realize that I am writing scripts in my own head about what I can’t do that prevents me from doing what I want to do. I have been working on some craft designs which I want to get published – and there is an outlet for it, but it requires me to get some good photographs of my work and I keep convincing… Read more »
Detra
Detra
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to me? Yes! What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story I am currently unemployed, not excited about returning to the traditional work environment and grateful for the time I have to focus on redirecting myself. However, I am not sure which direction I should go in. I feel like I have good ideas but not great ideas that excite me. I feel like once I have a handle on that I can… Read more »
Sheela
Sheela
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes, very. 2. I want to get control of my health. I know a better diet and exercising regularly will change so many aspects of my life. I’ll have more energy, likely be sharper, feel better about my appearance, and by proving to myself that I could stick to that would help me feel like all the other things I want to change or achieve are more attainable. I know the benefits way outweigh the cons….but I still have trouble. I just read The Power of Habit (now my favorite book of 2012) and I’m trying to be really… Read more »
John Neil
John Neil
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yeah it was a great post Ramit. I like how you put fools on blast without remorse, but what’s really great is how you stand your ground when people call you out for your perceived ‘impoliteness’. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to finally shed my “baby fat.” I’m not obese, but I have a bit of a ‘soft look.’ To do this I’m going to take… Read more »
JC
JC
3 years 6 months ago

1. This very much so interests me.
2. I want to take control of emotions overwhelming me into distractions from doing/reading things to improve myself/my life.
3. Nothing. You are as straight forward as always. Being one of your stupid readers, I love it.

Mel
Mel
3 years 6 months ago
1. I am very interested in this, and actually have “read IWT archives” on my January goal list for this exact reason – taking control in 2013. 2. I need to work on those psychological barriers. I’ve been laid off since June, living off unemployment which I’m not even managing as well as I could, trying to decide what I want to do next. I just recently overcame the barrier blocking me from applying for some “big” jobs and the one blocking me from applying outside my geographic region, but there are still a lot of internal scripts stopping me… Read more »
Lauren
Lauren
3 years 6 months ago
1. This was very interesting and a great way to start of the new year! Your writing not only provides motivation but also also a sense of confidence that I can “figure things out.” 2. One concrete thing I’d like to achieve this year is applying/attending graduate classes. I’ve, in essence, been waiting for my employer to make the decision for me–even though I know it will be beneficial for my career wherever I am. The comments you gave the woman who wanted to run 3x a week really made an impact. I should stop putting the decision off because… Read more »
Alex
Alex
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Definitely. I’m only just beginning to grasp the power my terrible invisible scripts has over me. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. Something that frightens me A LOT – beginning my career in journalism. I have MASSIVE barriers with this one. I feel pressured to start a career as I’ve spent too long studying. I’m not even sure if I really want to be a journalist but… Read more »
Yvonne
Yvonne
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes, this is very interesting & relevant to me. 2. The 1 thing I want to take control of is my time. I procrastinate & arrive late to practically everything. This habit has cost me dearly with work, relationships & much more. 3. I was a bit surprised when you mentioned a link between people who succeed in the 4 areas: health, career, money & relationships. But once I thought about it, I totally agree. I did not expect you to emphasize having control, yet that is what most of us want out of life. It’s very encouraging to… Read more »
Joey
Joey
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes, definitely interested.
2. I want to work on increasing productivity on getting Actual Grown-Up Things Done around my house and for my family. I have four teenagers, a full-time job, and my partner is chronically ill — needless to say, I have too much to do and I keep dropping my obligations.
3. Nothing really a surprise, just lots of good stuff.

beth
3 years 6 months ago

Put your 4 teenagers to work doing stuff around the house. I was expected to cook as part of my family duties when I was in my teens and my mom was a healthy stay at home mom. I also helped with the laundry (hated it but it was part of helping with the family) and other things.

Nicolle
Nicolle
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit, I have been reading and internalising your lessons for a few years now. This year my eldest is starting school and I have applied to resume my degree as well. Emotionally, I have found someone unexpected to connect with. These are both things i control, for myself. But so often I hear other people’s scripts loud and clear, (husbands family) which as a positive and self-motivated person can be crippling. I allow myself the indecision and fear, I refuse it power and don’t act… then I move on, clear headed. It interests me that your posts motivate me the… Read more »
Hayley
3 years 6 months ago

Awesome post, My goal for this year is to kick my family (mother and brothers) who have slowly accumulated in my house and are taking over.

Jesus Magana
3 years 6 months ago

–Is this interesting to you?
Yes that’s why I did read in calm the whole post

–What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of?
I want to take control of the time I waste when starting to work everyday. Almost everyday I go to my desk and then instead of starting to work I spend several minutes or hours doing nothing.

What surprised you about today’s post?
I self sabotage a lot, even unconsciously.

Martine
3 years 6 months ago

Boom. I needed this.
This article interested me, as soon as I read the title. I want to take control of my freelance sideline, because it looks like it’s getting bigger than I expected. I also want to take control of my finances, seeing as my husband and I want to start our small coffee catering business this year. And honestly, what surprised me about today’s post was that skinny photo of yourself!

Danielle
Danielle
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit, First, yes I find this post as well as many of your other posts interesting. I wouldn’t follow them if I didn’t. Second, I want to have control of my financial future. Let me elaborate. I have my dream job as a technical writer; however, the position is a grant-funded university position so negotiating a pay raise won’t happen until the grant is renewed. In fact, in June, I may not even have a job (the grant is funded by the NSF which is part of the government and the program may be cut by a cut in federal… Read more »
Jeremy Meyer
Jeremy Meyer
3 years 6 months ago
I think this is great! In fact, my resolution this year is: Stop deliberating and start DOING. Personally, I want to take more control of my relationships. Over the summer, I was reading books about dating and making better progress, but after a hard breakup, I gave up for a few months. This year, I’m going to take all of my personal relationship seriously, not only dating, but also to help build my professional network. One thing you said that surprised me was about the cascading effect. I’d never really thought about how one area of control could have such… Read more »
Ron
Ron
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Absolutely! I feel like you know me personally as everything you described above is just how I feel/act. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. Getting in shape. Not just losing weight but getting fit! I am older and have allowed myself to fall into the traps that you talk about. Now it is harder than ever to get back to doing what I know I NEED to… Read more »
Tyrone
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes
2. I NEED to take control of my thoughts and allow them to guide me into finding the right career.
3. I’m always surprised at how it sounds like your message are designed specifically for me. Everything else I read seems to be just off to one side, like they are trying to correct an issue that isn’t exactly what I need to have corrected, but you are right on.

Christine
Christine
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Controlling behavior and understanding the substance behind a thought has always been intreguing. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to take control of how effective I am in my relationships. I want to be the teacher and coach in my school who can lead students and faculty in projects and achieving goals. I should be a person who can offer solutions. It’s important for me to close… Read more »
Lana
Lana
3 years 6 months ago

Very interesting! Thank you, Ramit. I was reading your blog and recognizing my own behavior, my friends’ behavior.
It was surprising to learn about people’s defenses coming up. Like one of your readers mentioned, when people realize it’s not a “quick fix”, they loose interest or respond with their script.
Wanting results but not doing anything for it – also very true. I have forwarded your blog to my daughter. I hope it is an eye opener for her just like it was for me.
Thank you!

Farhana
Farhana
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Hell yes! This is my own theme for the year too! In fact just yesterday I was talking to my friends about possible career paths that I can pursue in the next few years, and the specific skill sets that I need to build in the mean time. I was planning to take on projects that would help me hone those skills. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a… Read more »
Nicolle
Nicolle
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit, I have been reading and internalising your lessons for a few years now. This year my eldest is starting school and I have applied to resume my degree as well. Emotionally, I have found someone unexpected to connect with. These are both things i control, for myself. But so often I hear other people’s scripts loud and clear, (husbands family) which as a positive and self-motivated person can be crippling. I allow myself the indecision and fear, I refuse it power and don’t act… then I move on, clear headed. It interests me that your posts motivate me the… Read more »
Rick
3 years 6 months ago
Been reading your stuff for a few years, Ramit. I’ve always thought of myself as a top performer; yet looking back, I’m unsure why. Of course I’ve done some of the things you’ve talked about before regarding personal finance, just like I’ve done different exercise habits. The common theme is just what you mentioned above in one of the videos: I’m on a pendulum, moving back and forth, making some progress and losing it again. For example, I’ve been the “female supermodel” build just like you were previously, hovering between 135 and 140 lbs. This summer I managed to hit… Read more »
Vincent
Vincent
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Totally. I am knocked off my chair when you talked about losing control. The first step is realize that I have lost control over my life right now, which I am unaware previously. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. For me, it has to be reading faster with good retention. The problem I have is, once I focus on a topic that I wanted to deep dive,… Read more »
Cathy0
Cathy0
3 years 6 months ago
HI Ramit and happy new year! Love this post, your approach to behavioural change is really interesting to me. Some of the stuff you wrote last year starting me thinking about barriers and how to make change. The thing that made the most impression was about changing one small step at a time. So I decided I was going to go to the gym and walk on the treadmill once a week. I would have previously thought this was a waste of time (like the person you mentioned above). However, I managed it and after a couple of months upped… Read more »
beth
3 years 6 months ago
I want to find and address my invisible scripts that hold me back. I was aware of the idea for years but until I started watching your videos I wasn’t aware how they presented themselves. I have found some of them just by making a list of things I knew I could never do, free flow style. Just start writing I could never… and see what comes out. I know there are more in there but I have found a number, most of them center around money and popularity. Like I could never fit in with highly effective, very well… Read more »
Gretchen
Gretchen
3 years 6 months ago
I never miss one of your emails. You are such a terrific writer. Every single time I find something that makes me laugh out loud, and something else that makes me think. I know you want me to tell you how I’m changing my life and all, and I don’t blame you for wanting to hear that, and my life is already a pretty damn peachy adventure if you want to know the truth. I did buy your IWT book and I’m reading it with great interest, and I also read the Power of Habit by Duhigg which was marvelous,… Read more »
Sreneedi
Sreneedi
3 years 6 months ago
I always find what you have to say interesting and different (in fact, your salary negotiation class got me an unheard-of raise this year) it is just that the time it takes me to read it is not something I am willing to do most nights. I generally just peruse the important points from my phone and add whatever book you’ve recommended to my wish list on Amazon (which works, by the way). I finally hacked it though! I took a speed reading course this year as part of my “always learning” goals and now I just copy and paste… Read more »
Greg
Greg
3 years 6 months ago

I am very interested in this subject. I do realize I have invisible scripts and would like to conquer them. In particular, I have an invisible script that tells me I’ll start something and eventually fail or quit. This year, I plan on turning my photography hobby into a profitable business. Therefore, I would like to take control of keeping myself on track with my goals.

As far as surprise about this article, I suppose it’s the perfect timing of it.

Pearl
Pearl
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? – Definitely! I want to get up earlier and get my planned tasks finished! 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. – I want to get up earlier… I procrastinate too much and I’ve just wasted so much time on my bed! 3. What surprised you about today’s post? – That before taking my major career move 3 years ago, I had also been saying to myself for… Read more »
jeo
jeo
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. I just quit a job (in the profession/work that I adore and am really good at) because the environment and philosophy of the organization was making me crazy. I don’t know exactly what’s next but I know it won’t come if I don’t open doors that will make it happen. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My courage – I want to take the time to ask, “What do you really want?” and find a way to act on it. 3. What surprised you about today’s post?… Read more »
Kate
Kate
3 years 6 months ago
Yes, this is interesting to me! The one specific thing I want to take control of is a half hour of work on my professional portfolio, six days a week. I know from past experience that once I start, I’ll typically do much more than half an hour, but that’s my goal. What surprised you about today’s post? How closely it matched my own thinking in the last month or so. This is the time of year when people assemble lengthy lists of goals, but I felt in my gut this was a mistake. I’ve taken on just three goals:… Read more »
lhamo
lhamo
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Definitely. Looking at how our psychology functions and the steps we need to take to effect real, meaningful and sustainable change is the key to mastering any core area of our lives/reaching any significant goal. I get so tired of blogs that put things in terms of “ten steps to change your life” or “nine ways to save $10 now. Those are meaningless without greater attention to the overall systematic way we are running (often ruining) our lives. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My health, because everything else rests… Read more »
Joao Soares
Joao Soares
3 years 6 months ago

Extremely interesting. I want to take control of my body fat, reducing it to below 14% by the end of March. To do that, I will try out a Ketogenic regimen for 6 days a week, and measure/weight every 7th day. I was surprised by the way you quickly identified so many invisible scripts in a simple everyday conversation.

MJ
MJ
3 years 6 months ago
I finally decided to start breaking down these fricking barriers,scripts, and fears. I stumbled upon your content sometime in Oct/Nov 2012 and have grown to love your sarcastic writing (You keep it Real!). I often think the same things or same way but never say it. Anyways I started automating some things..got all the bills I could going to Credit Card and a few from checking, which I hate because I feel out of control when someone else is taking from my checking account. Because like your jackets next to the bed, I would often do the same with bills… Read more »
dave
dave
3 years 6 months ago

1) yes- it was a very interesting post

2) I would like to build my social skills. I could be sometimes aloof and freeze when i meet new people.

3) it gave an amazing insight into how we sabotage ourselves

Bert
Bert
3 years 6 months ago

Count me in.

Linda
Linda
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Yes. I definitely need to understand the psychology behind the choices I make. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to take control of my time, money, and change careers. I make decent money, but I owe lots of student loans, and shop to try and escape. I have wanted to work for myself for a long-time, have an idea for changing careers, but it’s going to require… Read more »
Dan N.
Dan N.
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes, this is interesting.

2. I want to control my information diet and how it affects my productivity. I work in an environment where I often have to wait 15 minutes or more for a build to complete. During this time I often tell myself “Oh, I will check my Google Reader / Facebook / whatever while I wait.” inevitably I don’t snap out of my passive reading hypnosis until long after my build has completed having wasted a significant amount of time.

Tony
Tony
3 years 6 months ago

Thank you for this Ramit. I just tweeted this out, I have some friends who are always saying they “need to figure it out” I hope one of them clicks the link.

Jon
Jon
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. I’ve been reading IWT for 4-5 years I’d say, and I’ve noticed the evolution from intelligent personal finance to E1K to Dream Job, and now a fuller focus on psychology and soft skills. My own evolution is opposite. The stuff you’re talking about now is stuff I NEED. It’s actually required in order for me to follow through on E1K, etc. I kind of love it. You’re hacking at the barriers that prevent folks from succeeding at the stuff you did in the past few years. Well done. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC… Read more »
ana
ana
3 years 6 months ago

Yes, these topics are very interesting. I need to take control of my career as I no longer enjoy what I do and feel that I am no longer learning.

I’m surprised at how many different areas of my life I need to take control of!

Erik
Erik
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Absolutely! 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to improve my productivity in the amount of time I spend writing and drawing. I tend to procrastinate and I don’t always practice my writing and drawing consistently. I’ll play a video game or get distracted by something that my family wants me to do, etc. I want to get into a writing career and now that I… Read more »
naomi
3 years 6 months ago
1. absofuckinglutely!! 2. i have recently taken control of my weight.losing 12 kilos. next step is to take out the carbs and clean eat 4hr body business.. any ways… the one thing that is on my mind is my communication. I love photography but my communication skills is shit. I get flustered and i judge myself thinking im making a fool out of myself. So this stops me from stepping out and talking to more ppl about my business (if youd call it a business). I want to be free of my judement. 3.I dont think you surprise anyone Ramit,… Read more »
mags
mags
3 years 6 months ago
“Then one day, we wake up and wonder how our lives turned out the way they did…” This is the statement that really jumped out at me. I’m in my mid-thirties, I’ve got a decent job, but it’s certainly not my dream job. If I continue on my current career path, I have an opportunity to climb the corporate ladder with a successful company. The thought of this though makes me want to puke. I cannot fathom working in a corporate office for another 30 years. I have always wanted to start a business. However, I have terrible restraint when… Read more »
Jermaine
Jermaine
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes very. I’ve used excuses and scripts most of my life to avoid developing social skills and I’m paying for it.

2. I want to talk to a beautiful woman without acting like a wuss! How to become a man women will want to date and improve social skillsto talk to anyone.

3. Its everything II’ve told myself most of my life and I’m finally admitting it.

Sarah
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? YES!!!!!! Finally- it took me a long time of bullshitting around, “Oh I’m a free spirit!” Yeah, how has that been working out for me? Not. What I’m discovering right now is that productivity in my business will FREE me like I’ve never been freed before. EVERYTHING in me is 100% devoted to being EFFECTIVE and not just efficient in my career and finances. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Growing my business EFFECTIVELY and elegantly to generate six figures this year. Yes. 3.What surprised you about today’s post? How… Read more »
Garrett
Garrett
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit, you always have interesting material because of the research you put in before you start writing. Thank you! You were dead on with taking control of my relationships and social skills. I’ve been on vacation with my brother’s family and inlaws. I’ve been mildly pissed about going to so many of their family functions. I’m not even part of their family. This morning I plainly told them I would be at a coffee shop reading. And the world DIDN’T END! I spent today doing exactly what I wanted: grabbed a morning coffee, read, went hiking and enjoyed my day.… Read more »
Shoba Haridas
Shoba Haridas
3 years 6 months ago
This is more than interesting to me. It’s echoing exactly what I was thinking. I want to start my own business and I’ve been tinkering with the idea for a year but that’s exactly what I’ve been doing tinkering. And at the end of last year, I realized I spent an inordinate time doing stuff and there has been no result. It’s very demoralizing. The bit on what an average person and a top performer does surprised and embarrassed me. I think like an average person. But I need to start thinking like a top performer. I need to have… Read more »
Olivia
Olivia
3 years 6 months ago
Hi Ramit 🙂 1. Is this interesting to you? OMG yes! You are a rockstar, this is just the kind of stuff I am working on this year. Control!! 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. OK – I was just thinking about this today, actually, so I’m glad you asked. I have a MASSIVE internal script that says that life is so much easier for everyone else, and that success and happiness are… Read more »
Iva
Iva
3 years 6 months ago

For this year I want to focus on taking control of my earning. I have already spent 2012 working endless hours on projects that pay almost nothing and I have to focus on projects and clients that pay more.

Sagar Lakhani
Sagar Lakhani
3 years 6 months ago

This post is extremely interesting and relevant, since taking charge of one’s destiny is in everyone’s best interest. Changing one’s mindset is crucial in changing one’s behavior. Ramit’s tips on productivity, social skills, and one’s career will definitely be helpful.

Joshua D
Joshua D
3 years 6 months ago

Haven’t really noticed the amount of psychology that goes in to life. Makes me wonder if mastering social psychology will help understand the way we are. I want to start looking in to that for a life skill or even a career.

Luis
Luis
3 years 6 months ago
Yes this is interesting more than I thought at first. I would like to be more productive with my online business and manage my time accordingly. As I work a day job and have a online business as well. There are days I feel totally overwhelmed and I lose total focus. Today’s post made me realise that if I can set my mind to it, then I can achieve. Sounds simple right, but somehow there is always an excuse “invisible scripts” Now that I know what is stopping me, I need to focus on what I want to get where… Read more »
Jen
Jen
3 years 6 months ago

It’s interesting to me, or I wouldn’t be reading it.

I want to take control of my eating habits–specifically, to eat more mindfully and eat less! I eat too much food, much of it while doing other things (reading, watching TV, talking on the phone), which means I don’t enjoy it (it’s hugely rewarding in a rat-pushing-a-lever kind of way, but not actually enjoyable) and I’m overweight.

Nothing about the post really surprised me; I find that your posts often clarify something that I already know or suspect, and that their value is mostly in helping with implementation. Like coaching.

Kipp Kahlia
3 years 6 months ago
This was an encouraging blog post for me! (and trust me, I needed that). I’m a lead and rhythm guitarist (female, so it gets bizarre at times), and a vocalist. I am getting back into performing live after a long, unplanned sabbatical, PLUS I’ve changed musical genres (from reggae to soul), and people in my new genre are just beginning to know that I EXIST. I want to gig (as often as I want, and for nice money), and I want to get my own musical project off the ground. I’m putting myself in all kinds of new and different… Read more »
Sabine
Sabine
3 years 6 months ago
1.I feel like I’m not in control of anything in my life at the moment, so, yes, this is interesting. The more things I “fail” at, the more new things I start. I pick up new interests from every bloody where from worm composting to minimalism just so for once I might succeed and this success might spead. 2.I want to be able to finish things. I’ve been working on my master’s thesis for more than a year and I’m still not done (oh, I hate it so!). I have so many unfinished projects lying around – not at the… Read more »
Janine
Janine
3 years 6 months ago
1. YES…. relevant and spot on 2. My career. I’ve been stuck in the same job for 5.5years blaming everyone and everything around me for the lack of fulfillment I’m feeling. I kept thinking that as soon as I have a baby (we have great maternity benefits) then I will find a career more exciting, more me, but my twins are now 16 months, and now I’m finding myself making new excuses. I work close to home, My team are great, my boss understands that I have kids… blablabla. Bottom Line, I need to be a beter example for my… Read more »
Michelle
Michelle
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting? Hell yes! This is exactly what I was telling myself I wanted to do this year, so having you cover it at the same time is ace. One thing I want to master. Not letting my children be an excuse to not do work or go out and meet people. Finding a way to have quality time with them while still living my life and pursuing my goals. I was surprised that anyone would tell you that calling someone dumb was a mistake. Sure, you write for your readers, so alienating them might be a problem, but… Read more »
paulien
paulien
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes it is. I have some areas where I am not taking control, or only just started to get more in control. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I have a few different areas, but one of them is my fitness. While I don’t have health problems right now, I know that exercising will do me a lot of good, but there is always some reason why I stop… Read more »
Andrew
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. Despite wanting to stop reading as I found it a long post. I thought to myself. That’s what I always do. I can confidently say that’s my habit year in year out. Then at some point in the year. I’m frustrated, depressed, angry with myself/the world because I’m not where I want to be, certainly financially. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I love the ONE… Read more »
José Filipe
José Filipe
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. I really need to take control of my life. My work can be interesting but I’m stuck because I don’t know how I should do it. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I want to be able to inspire and have people respect me at my job. I want to be the very best and make a difference. This year is the safety year for the… Read more »
Jenny
3 years 6 months ago

The concept of not taking control really resonated with me. My husband always says everything after “but” is BS, and once again, he is right. I realize I let a few circumstances stand in my way of taking control and getting what I want. My financial picture is going to be much brighter this year by staying focused, setting realistic goals and doing inventory more often.

Ross
Ross
3 years 6 months ago
This email couldn’t come at a better time I have come to the realisation that i relinquished control of all areas of my life after a bad break up a few years back. I had an excuse for everything that would come my way and my quality of life has really diminished. But of late I’ve started to take back control, and all the stupid rational for things like “I’ve got lots if friends that I hang out with individually why would i want to mix those group!” I’m beginning to see as just I’m scared that they might expose… Read more »
Vuk
Vuk
3 years 6 months ago
Hi. Strait to your questions: 1. Is this interesting to you? Yes. It’s in line with what I have been thinking for the past several months. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I don’t know is this specific enough, but let’s try: Due to some risky business, instead of earning money I got myself in debt, about 30k euros. Not owning it to a single bank or person, but to a lot of… Read more »
Kalai
Kalai
3 years 6 months ago

Interesting? Yeah your articles are always interesting even when I have read them more than once.

My goal is to pick one thing to worry about and follow it through until I find an insight as to why it worked or didn’t.

Your comment on invisible scripts are so true and I refused to believe it when I first read it on one of your blogs but I definitely have them!

Elenor
Elenor
3 years 6 months ago
Aw come-on, Ramit, *everything* you write is interesting, even the stuff that has no direct application to my life now or in the foreseeable future. (I’ve inherited a small manufacturing company; not my dream job, but a job I’m enjoying (most of the time). I won’t be looking for a “real” job … for the rest of my life …. if I’m able to keep this company afloat, which I think I will. Thanks to you, I think I’ve gotten my financial life in the chute that leads to being controlled. Still paying off massive (massive!) (personal) debt, but it’s… Read more »
Roxy
Roxy
3 years 6 months ago
Yes this is interesting to me, I don’t know how many times I’ve said to myself I’m going to take control and create my life the way I would like to see it. . . then I always lapse into old habits. I would like to finally stick to some of the ideas and goals that I’m always thinking about. I want to increase my monthly income (to save for a trip to visit family) by completing freelance design jobs online. I start a project and then I let time, discouragement or my everyday life stop me from finishing. I… Read more »
Sean Oliver
3 years 6 months ago

Interesting stuff Ramit, I like it. I’d like to be able to specifically take control of how i’m perceived by others. Putting your advice into practice has led some folk to shield their eyes in the face of awesome, I don’t want to slow down, but I’m not great at managing that currently.

I’m surprised it took this long for you to get to this subject area. 🙂

Johnny Mean
Johnny Mean
3 years 6 months ago
1.This should be an interesting year as we move deeper into our own personal psychology and barriers. 2.I want to take control of holding back my personal story when interactive with others. I get many similar red flag questions, especially while traveling abroad for several months with my wife. (How do you manage financially, what do you do for a living? ; how could you possibly do X?:Sometimes being accused of straight Bull shitting, or needing to “relax/tone it down”.) I’ve also compiled a number of destructive behaviors that will be addressed as well. Being productive is easy, keeping it… Read more »
Kristin S
Kristin S
3 years 6 months ago
1. Very interesting and timely 🙂 2. ONE THING – I want to take control of my career, I’ve been letting it sit stagnent while I work on other things but I need to take control and find my dream job. As opposed to trying to “figure it out” which is something I’ve been saying for two years now.. 3. I’m not sure how surprising this actually was to me but it did hit me in the face that I’ve been being an idiot, the fact that I’ve been saying that I need to “figure it out” for two years… Read more »
Raphael Linhares
Raphael Linhares
3 years 6 months ago
– Is this interesting to you? Definitely, because it focuses on areas I consider “CORE” for all the others. – What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. To maintain my motivation level above average. – What surprised you about today’s post? The fact that it wasn’t focused solely on finances, but mostly on “soft/social” skills. It has also intrigued me a lot, it’ll be interesting to see you apply the structured approach you deliver in… Read more »
sonja
sonja
3 years 6 months ago
1. yes, it is very interesting and different than usual. I like it. 2. I want to learn every day, or at least few days a week when I have my days off and don’t work, more about graphic design since I would like to find additional work in that area… 3. Although I read about invisible script before in your mails/blogs i forgot a little about it. This article reminds me about it. I got clearer picture about my own barriers. Also, like some of your other readers, I also got New Year resolution to improve myself and do… Read more »
gina mangano
gina mangano
3 years 6 months ago

it is very interesting
my state of mind has always been to be in the zone-whether it be work or home or relationship–
my goal this year is to be able to divide my energies to all my endeavors without overwhelming myself with just one

Cam
3 years 6 months ago

Let’s go!

shanon
shanon
3 years 6 months ago
1. It’s very interesting to me…I like the focus on figuring out which things are worth controlling. 2. I have a few things I’m focusing on in 2013, but one of them is fitness/weightloss. Specifically, I’m focusing on losing 1 pound per week…rather than coming up with a laundry list of habits to change and fitness milestones to hit, I’m taking it week by week and my approach is “what can I do today that will help me lose my pound this week?”…the things that will help that will naturally help improve my health/fitness, too…choices fall either into the “helps… Read more »
Krista B.
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Absolutely–My plan for 2013 is the same and so this should make for an interesting journey. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My health and fitness. I have already started simple stretching and exercises to do first thing in the morning to wakeup and get my body working. I know for long term success that it is establishing habits that I will be successful. What surprised you about today’s post? No surprises really, but an acknowledgment that even when others are being successful it is hard to tear down our… Read more »
Kate
3 years 6 months ago
I want to finally, and completely, take control of my & my husband’s finances. I got halfway through your book 3 years ago and never finished. Life got in the way… wedding, graduation, new job (ended up hating it), now my first baby. I am so ready to finish the job and have our financial goals in place so I can stop thinking about it! It occupies a huge amount if my brain space. It will be my Big Win, after which I look forward to focusing on my next Big Win Thanks Ramit for all of your work and… Read more »
Timothy Moser
3 years 6 months ago

One of your best posts yet, Ramit. Really convicting and yet inspiring at the same time. I’m very much looking forward to this year.

JenniferW
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes, very. And goes along with some other concepts I’ve been working on. 2. Focusing on one thing at a time… I like to “multi-task” but, when I’m honest with myself, I’m simply enjoying the distraction (and delay) of jumping from project to project without accomplishing a whole lot. BUT within this “focus” I want to plan X to help with Y (ie, I want to complete in (and win) Mountain Trail Competitions (horse events) this year – In order to support that goal I am training for adventure races which will improve my fitness level… improving my performance… Read more »
David
David
3 years 6 months ago

#2. Upping the pace of the metronome in my head. I want to be pumping to “Staying Alive” and not “I Will Survive”.

Stacy McKenna
Stacy McKenna
3 years 6 months ago
1. Absolutely! Last month everyone in the house was diagnosed with varying degrees of ADHD, and so this month has been all about understanding how our brains work, and the kinds of tools we need to remove barriers and get our focus working effectively. We’re already seeing improvements in housekeeping, paperwork, and physical exercise arenas. Now, to keep it up… 2. I want to get back on top of my bee-related stuff. As secretary of my local bee group, I’m horribly behind on writing up notes from conventions and reading trade publications. It’s embarrassing. 3. The point about “Not taking… Read more »
Maja
Maja
3 years 6 months ago
1. Extremely! Thanks!! 2. The fear of “getting myself out there”. By now I have figured out quite specifically what I would really like to do in my life (I’m 35!), BUT I have been noticing recently that I am finding a lot of excuses not to start. To be honest there are 2 excuses – “I’m not ready yet, I should prepare more” and “I don’t feel properly inspired, I’ll do it later”. I have also started working on a project with a friend, who is a “total doer”, I would have an idea and half hour later she… Read more »
alexia
alexia
3 years 6 months ago

i am really excited for these 4 weeks to kick off! the one main thing that i want to take control of is the habit of waking up early. there are a lot of daylight hours lost sleeping, and i want them back!

Sam
Sam
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes, I’ve read your previous articles about psychological barriers – very interesting stuff. It’s crazy how invisible the barriers really are to oneself.

2. I want to take control of my career. Everything you mentioned in your article above regarding careers describes me to a T.

3. The number of people who relate to this article. When you get so frustrated about something, you begin to think everyone else has it much better than you do.

Karolyn
Karolyn
3 years 6 months ago

Is this interesting to you? –
Yep! It’s amazing how many aspects of life this touches on. So excited for 2013!

What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? –
To commit to a yoga or pilates class 4x/month.

What surprised you about today’s post?
Efficient vs. Effective. I can be hyper-efficient, but I’m interested in learning more about where to focus my energy.

Logan York
Logan York
3 years 6 months ago
(1) Is this interesting to you? Yes. Here’s why: I’ve been working through your material for three years, and it’s helped me to achieve some truly life-changing things (dramatically increasing my income/standard of living, maxing out investment accounts, saving 6+ months of expenses in the bank). But I want to work towards CONSISTENCY in my action and attitude, to have control over not necessarily super-detailed goals, but over daily habits and a mindset that just add up to positive outcomes in my life. Right now, I’ve scripted myself to think that if I’m going to accomplish something that it always… Read more »
Dino
Dino
3 years 6 months ago
>Is this interesting to you? yes, I’m posting! >What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I need to be able to write in English like I write in my mother tongue or even better. My country is failing hard and with English I can make more money and help family and friends who are in need (also I like money). I’ve always read and listen a lot, so I can understand English perfectly but I never took the time to improve my writing skills. This made me miss some opportunities in the past, and the worst… Read more »
Kimberly
Kimberly
3 years 6 months ago
1. This post was definitely interesting! I’ve already shared it with a couple of people in the hopes that it will it inspire them just as it has inspired me. 2. A specific thing I want to take control of is my health, even more specifically get back in running shape. I used to be extremely athletic, but as I have become more involved in my other passions, I’ve basically stopped working out. I’m not overweight or particularly unhealthy; in fact I’ve lost 10 lbs since I’ve slowly ended my regular trips to the gym (mostly in muscle mass). I’ve… Read more »
Ann
Ann
3 years 6 months ago

Is this interesting to you? Yes.
What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. Being less of a slacker in my job.
What surprised you about today’s post? You didn’t try to sell any products in it. You’ve got so much crap for sale on the start page it looks like a spam website I immediately try to leave.

Rebecca
3 years 6 months ago

1. Yes.
2. Create good habits around spending and paying off the rest of my little debt that I have, and continue to follow my career path and bringing home more than enough money by doing what I love. One thing I want to control, is unconscious spending and creating healthy patterns around financial/life choices.
3. That we were on the same page for 2013. I just chuckled when your email came in and said, “go figure.”

Zach
Zach
3 years 6 months ago

Absolutely interested! For me, the ONE thing I want to take control of is my career. I’m in my early (approaching mid) 30’s and still have PLENTY of time left, but don’t want to wake up at 50 wondering what the hell happened. As far as what’s surprising? It’s that I’m still reading your digital gold without having done much of anything! Time to shed some invisible scripts and move forward.

Greg P
Greg P
3 years 6 months ago
To answer: -Is this interesting to you? Yes, very much so… I’ve only become aware IWTY over the past few weeks and have been using the strategies in the book to start exerting control over what were my runaway financial practices (as in my money was running away from me, often times at near warp speed with very little to show for it). The next step on the list was exerting control over aspects of my life I had been lax on, so the timing on this is very applicable to me. -What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to… Read more »
Alicia
Alicia
3 years 6 months ago

Do you have a list/post about all the invisible scripts somewhere?

Kishan Shah
Kishan Shah
3 years 6 months ago

Ramit – I really enjoyed this post. I don’t think anyone has control over all parts of their life (there is no such things as perfection, we can all do better). In terms of exercise, your readers may find my 220 lb weight loss story helpful:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/20/i-lost-weight-kishan-shah_n_1900533.html

Kishan

Nick Brown
Nick Brown
3 years 6 months ago

I am very interested in your programs Ramit.

I want the ability to go from a vague idea and to realized, tangible product/service/project.

I guess nothing really surprised me about your post since I’ve been reading your blog for quite some time. Even when you call your readers/audience stupid. 🙂

Dane Johnson
Dane Johnson
3 years 6 months ago
Ramit, My brother actually works for you and I am that person who has been told 100x how much you can help and I have ignored all advice. I finally started reading and I am on board. To bad I wasted so much time. Is this interesting to you? Yes, I feel that my life has pretty much happened around me and I want to really take control. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story.… Read more »
Matt
Matt
3 years 6 months ago
I want to take control of my discipline and consistency. The Pendulum you talk about where we go from manic work sprees and periods of lethargy describes me perfectly. I’ll be all gung-ho about taking control of an area of my life and I’ll implement a system to take control of that. Then 2 – 6 weeks later I’ll have some success but I’ll self sabotage. One recent example is I wanted to get in shape. I’m 5’6″ and 125 lbs. Pretty good but I wanted to add muscle. I read Tim Ferriss’s 4-Hour-Body and implemented his program of ridiculously… Read more »
Bradley
Bradley
3 years 6 months ago

Is this interesting to you?
Absolutely. I feel that the coming weeks are going to be difficult, but invaluable.
I look forward to your next post!

What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of?
I want to improve my social skills so that I feel comfortable and confident
when conversing and interacting with anyone I meet.

What surprised you about today’s post?
Probably the general topic of control. Looking back on 2012, I see now that a lot of my frustration came from a lack of control in the areas of career, productivity, social skills, and money.

Lance Goyke
3 years 6 months ago

Ramit, did you work with Martin for your diet changes? My distance client from Sweden is dating him.

Lance

Jack Armijo
Jack Armijo
3 years 6 months ago
This post really hit home for me. I’ve had the same goals for years in the areas of financial independence, health and fitness, and fulfilling relationships. I’m 40 years old so I’m a little older than your typical visitor but your posts really connect with me which is why I keep coming back. Over the years I’ve been successful in each of the areas above but apparently I lack stamina because eventually I get out of shape, stop moving forward in my career or professional goals, or lose contact with some close friends. It feels like I’m always starting over.… Read more »
Jordan
Jordan
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? Yes! I want to feel in control of the important facets of my life, but approaching that task is often daunting. 2. What is one specific thing you want to take control of? I want to become better at identifying important tasks so I don’t waste my time with useless minutiae, no matter how efficient I am. 3. What surprised you about today’s post? Most surprising was how I could identify invisible scripts rising up as I was reading the post. I could just leave my life as it is right now, and it’d… Read more »
Kurt Hauck
Kurt Hauck
3 years 6 months ago

This will be a very interesting year.

I always cave in to family demands.

I always knew it is hard for people to be happy for others but I hadn’t made the jump to the idea that it is a self defense strategy.

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[…] why am I doing this? Why make TAKING CONTROL the theme of this […]

Steve
Steve
3 years 6 months ago

The girl is a moron for more reasons than not improving herself. She’s only been on a couple dates and can’t figure out why this guy who she barely knows hasn’t changed his life around her yet… Hello, wreaks of desperation.

Barbara Weary
Barbara Weary
3 years 6 months ago
I am very interested in getting in control. I see myself as a control freak. Lots of planning, goals, and vision. Most of the time this has worked for me. When I feel in control I feel safe. And when I’m not I become anxious. I’m not a youngster. I’ll be 71 in six months. So I have had a lot of life experiences and lessons learned. But I like the way you put things–simply and honestly. One specific thing that I will be working on is my health. Without good health it’s very difficult to do much else. What… Read more »
James Lett III
3 years 6 months ago
Sure, I’ll bite. Here’s your data point, Ramit. 😛 It’s always fun discussing yourself anyway. 1. Very interesting. I’ve bought and paid for Earn1K and haven’t gotten the investment out of it I planned to, which is entirely my fault. I’m going through the early modules over the next few days to see how I can apply them to my job search. I need a stable salary right now, not unstable freelance income. 2. I’m interested in learning how to wake up when I want to. I’m nocturnal. I LIKE being up until 2-4am, but I can’t seem to get… Read more »
James Lett III
James Lett III
3 years 6 months ago

Replying to my own comment, as I just realized after scrolling and reading through some comments (admittedly mostly Ramit’s. I value seeing others’ perspectives but too much time spend doing any one non-productive thing when I’m not where I want to be is a bad habit to get into)….just because I can’t test how waking up with different amounts of sleep affects my productivity doesn’t mean I can’t test different methods to ALLOW me to get up with less than 8 hours of sleep.

Laura
Laura
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Very! What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I want to spend less time online and more time getting things done. What surprised you about today’s post? A few things actually. Until you pointed it out, I had no idea how defensive I am every time I have those conversations with other people about weight loss and self improvement. But the biggest surprise to me was your point that much of what we are dissatisfied about in our lives has to do with a lack of being in control. If you… Read more »
Franklyn Roth
Franklyn Roth
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? Yes this is the root issue of all halting of success I have had in my past. I have grown to enjoy psychology in the past year and enjoy advice like this that does not pull any punches. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I will take control of college/career, I am jumping from idea to idea in college and will to pick a major and graduate and develop… Read more »
Steven Brown
Steven Brown
3 years 6 months ago

I recently moved to a new city after finding my first dream job, and I still don’t know many people here. A big focus of mine for 2013 is learning to meet new people and build quality relationships. It’s never been a strength of mine in the past, but it soon will be.

J Diven
J Diven
3 years 6 months ago
1) Interesting to me? Yes. Also find it interesting that you’re asking your readers to “verbalize” their interest as it probably helps us mentally make the switch to commitment and help us follow through as the opportunities to act on this advice present themselves 2) My Priority for 2013? Increase my comfort level with letting small stuff go or be automated so I can focus on and be present for the big things that will move the dial on my happiness: My wife and new baby, adding value for my company at work, investing in my development. Those are pretty… Read more »
Sarah
Sarah
3 years 6 months ago

1- Yes, very interesting
2- My career. I want to find a career path and work hard to succeed in it
3- I think like the average person when it comes to my career

Stefano
3 years 6 months ago
1. It’s beyond interesting. It’s coming exactly when I need it. 2. I want to take control of my career and well-being by making a consistent living, which I currently do not as a freelancer in a field I don’t enjoy anymore. Specifically, I want to start podcasting and be making my entire income from Internet radio by the end of the year, and establish myself as a media personality. 3. That for once I wasn’t mildly offended by your use of the word “losers.” I guess I’m having a wake-up call recently where I’ve realized I gave up control… Read more »
Lori Sarabia
Lori Sarabia
3 years 6 months ago
It is very interesting to me. The specific things I want to take control of are allowing outside influences to affect my mood, and my mood to affect my productivity. Also allowing my relationships to dictate my actions. What most surprises me is not that we have these self-defeating scripts, but how insidiously pervasive they are. Even when I think I’ve weeded them out, I catch them sneaking back in the back door. However, I have made progress. I used to tell myself I would never be published because the publishing industry was just too hard to break into. It… Read more »
Mina
Mina
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? YES, I am excited about the opportunity this could give me What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. I actually have two things, my health and social skills. I really want to work on improving my health. I need to get out of the excuses that I give my self for not being healthy, alot of which are procrastination and laziness. I think these excuses line up with my lack… Read more »
Joe V
Joe V
3 years 6 months ago
1-Is this interesting to you? Absolutely. You touched upon a lot of what I already knew but couldn’t put into words. Taking care of things not just efficiently but effectively as how I try to live my life. 2-What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I want to control how I generate income. My employer has been pressuring me to research new things and come up with ways to create new channels of revenue. If I’m going to put that much effort into discovering ways to make money I should just do it for myself. What… Read more »
Jaki
Jaki
3 years 6 months ago
Thank you, Ramit. I really don’t know how I started getting your emails but today I actually read this one all the way through. I like what you are saying even though I’ve already worked for over 30 yrs in the corporate world and had every unimaginable thing happen to me because I played by the FAIR rules. Now I’m layed off, working a $9/hr job that I’m good at but not making any real money. I have run out of excuses and I am ready, eager and looking forward to week 1. Don’t kick me out just yet because… Read more »
LM
3 years 6 months ago

Ramit,
1. YES!
2. Specifically I’m going to be more in control of how I collate and account for my business finances. I want this because I realise not having done so for a while has meant I’ve been unable to make properly informed decision because sometimes key info has been, which for instance has lead to me paying more tax than necessary sometimes.
3. I’m am struck by just how much information you keep giving away! Thank you Ramit 🙂

Heidi Coone
3 years 6 months ago

1. Is this interesting to you?
Yes, that is why I commented.

2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why.
I want to start posting 2 times a day on my blog for a month to get my post count up and I want to start guest blogging at a few places.

3. What surprised you about today’s post?
It made me think about what I really want to do ,and I was surprised about your reader comment.

Frank
Frank
3 years 6 months ago

I am a teacher at a high school. It really made me smile about the part in not controlling your career. I’ve had situations where my alarm clock disapproves of my relationship with the bed. But I have always told myself that I left out all of the prospects given to me in going corporate (I graduated business) because of my fueled desire to teach. Because 2013 will be my first full year in the job, 2013 will be a year of taking control – especially in my career.

Thanks a lot for the motivation, Ramit!

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[…] was reading Ramit Sethi’s hilarious blog and he talks about invisible scripts which I translate as excuses not to do anything. But anyway, […]

Precie
Precie
3 years 6 months ago

This was really interesting and its not new things at all thank you for the motivation and hopefully I will be able to take control on my life I am on my late late 30s and my life is in shambles

John
John
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Absolutely! I am one of Ramit’s readers who is NOT in his 20s. I will be 54 this year, and I find the energy and perceptiveness of Ramit’s posts to be enlightening and inspiring. Actually, Ramit, your material is universally applicable, especially in his economy. I took your dream job course beginning last January and it made a difference. I had been underproductive for over 4 years. I gained a reputation for too many job changes, though the experience I have in my field is staggering, in terms of both breadth and depth. At the… Read more »
Patrick Foley
3 years 6 months ago
1.Is this interesting to you? Absolutely. 2.What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? I’ve fixed a lot of things in my life over the last few years: Saved my marriage (we’re doing great – one day at a time). Got out of debt and back on stable financial footing. Got in shape (I’m a “streak runner” – I just passed 13 months of running at least a mile every day). Those are all really good things. But what I’m working to take control of now is making good on ALL of my commitments to others and… Read more »
Ian Giohuhi
Ian Giohuhi
3 years 6 months ago

This article was very interesting.

I have problems with procrastination and not wanting to share my problems with people.
I have wanted to start a passive income working on a niche site. Been reading about it for close to 3 years, started a blog last year and it stagnated. I have not tried anything else.
I NEED TO TAKE CONTROL OF MY LIFE!!!

Sunny
Sunny
3 years 6 months ago

why your emails are too long? we are busy with our own life but reading your email some time is too much. why keep short and interesting ????

jean
jean
3 years 6 months ago

Is this interesting to you?-Yes!
What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? – My life! specifically figure out what i want to do with my life/ career, and take proactive steps towards it
What surprised you about today’s post? – how tantalizingly accurate it is…

Diana
Diana
3 years 6 months ago
1. Is this interesting to you? YES. I graduated last June (undergrad) and have been flaffing about ever since. I’ve already started to take more control, and the fact that your emails will be helping me along the way is GREAT. 2. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. The most major thing is my physical and mental health — treating myself well by eating the way I used to (no dairy, lots of vegetables,… Read more »
Erica Pottorff
Erica Pottorff
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? – Yes this is a super interesting topic and I can’t wait to explore it more. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. -One specific thing that I would like to take control of is my fitness routine. I usually go to the gym once or twice a week and I really want to start going 3 times a week. But more than that I want to get to the… Read more »
Eric
3 years 6 months ago
Is this interesting to you? – yes. i can always improve. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Don’t just say “productivity” — tell me what part of being productive you want to improve, and why. Share a story. – in one of my (too many to be distracted) startups, i’ve been delaying the launch of an e-book for months (tips & stories by/for/about people affected by rare diseases). have been procrastinating and sometimes blaming others for delay. tonight i picked up the phone and went through specific tactics with a biz partner then sent an… Read more »
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[…] WORKING OUT INCORRECTLY: This is also why you see people who’ve been working out for years but don’t really show any visible changes. It’s scary for them to to admit that perhaps they’ve been working out wrong for years — and that while it makes them feel “good,” they are not getting the results they want. Codewords: “I’m not the kind of person who can lose that kind of weight” or “Lift weights? I’m a girl… […]

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[…] 2013: The Year of Taking Control by Ramit Sethi […]

Fiona
Fiona
3 years 6 months ago
Hey Ramit, I’m relatively new to reading your blog but love what I’m reading so far. To answer, Is this interesting to you? – Yes taking control of productivity, habits, social skills, natural networking and careers is definitely interesting. What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? Definitely productivity but more in a discipline over motivation way. I start off on all my goals with the best of intentions and all fired up but somewhere along the lines, the enthusiasm just fizzles out even when I’ve put hard earned money to the tune of 1K down atleast.… Read more »
Jared
Jared
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes this is incredibly interesting! 2. I want to take control and become productive in regards to my career as a musician/producer. I’m very smart, talented socially and musically and yet, I have for the past 5 years allowed myself to buy into several of my own “invisible scripts”. I let a job that pays me too little and exploits few of my biggest skills be what consumes most of my time. I have justified this job for so long because it is tied to music and production, but it doesn’t allow me to focus the necessary energy to… Read more »
Anorkor
Anorkor
3 years 6 months ago
Yes this was very interesting What is ONE SPECIFIC THING you want to take control of? My time table. Every now and then I improve it but cant seem to get it all right. I am a medical student and am usually dan 4 the day at 3 and then i have a few 1 or 2 hr meetings(one day) and i sleep at 10pm but the rest of the 5hrs I cant seem to take control of (i have learning on my timetable for those times). i know there is an invisible script somewhere in that sentence but i… Read more »
Colleen
Colleen
3 years 6 months ago
Yes this is very interesting to me, there are definitely areas of my life where I am not in control and I desperately want to be so it’s the perfect thing to start of 2013. I want to take control of my new Pampered Chef business. I found something fun that I enjoy doing to make some extra money on the side, it’s easy and a really great opportunity that I have but I am really just letting it sit there, and not putting in any effort, not taking control. I really want to start making those booking phone calls,… Read more »
Rhonda
Rhonda
3 years 6 months ago
Yes this is interesting because I have never taken control of things in my life. I have always let things happen to me. I ended up being a lawyer in a large law firm for 8 years. Hated it. Ran away from it. Got married and had kids. Now after being a SAHM for 15 years, I need to control and make important decisions about my future. I want to take control of my career. Currently I am not licensed in the state I live in. I need to take the bar. I used to work in finance. I want… Read more »
Dominic
Dominic
3 years 6 months ago

1. Is this interesting to me?
Yes!!!

2. The one thing I want ot take control of: My productivity habits, but more precisely my focus. I want this year, to develop a habit of working in 90 minutes chunks of insane focus on IMPORTANT tasks, and bring them to completion.

3. What surprised me?
The fact that so few people truly know how to change.

Martha
Martha
3 years 6 months ago
I don’t necessarily read posts in order. Coming back to this one, I found it most interesting, and while reading, recalled several instances when, in conversation, I mentioned something and immediately got a “why I can’t do it” back. Never had a name for it, but it is definitely an invisible script. I’m noticing my own invisible scripts and working to change them to positives. I want to take control of the earning part of my life. I’m self-employed, have been employed, would like to stay self-employed but doing something different. Over the last couple of years, I’ve actively researched/investigated… Read more »
JZ
JZ
3 years 6 months ago
One specific thing I want to take control of: Changing one bad habit I’ve had since college: staying up all night reading internet novels. Sometimes I have a deadline to catch or some task to complete that I’m not very motivated for, and it’ll prevent me from going to bed early. But instead of working productively, I’d get grumpy and read novels online — and strangely, I pick really long novels with more than 100 chapters. So, many times, this leads to me staying up all night, and still not catching the deadline or finishing what I should have finished.… Read more »
Donna
Donna
3 years 6 months ago

I just wanted to say that you’re an incredible writer and I look forward to reading more of what you’ve written!! 🙂

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[…] ‘I can’t get a Dream Job…I didn’t go to XYZ University / I don’t have 10 years of expe… (Experience matters, but there other factors that matter as much or more) […]

Brent
Brent
3 years 6 months ago
1. Yes, I am extremely interested in taking control of my life. 2. I want to take control of how I feel about my physical appearance. I eat vegan, am lean and monitor my calories/exercise via the LoseIt! app, and my brother and I hold each other accountable. But I have not precisely defined my fitness goals and don’t know how to measure those goals…scratch that, I want to forget about fitness goals and be happy. I am proactive and willing to do whatever it takes to get rid of the negativity in this part of my life…it is an… Read more »
Tulio
Tulio
3 years 6 months ago

1) I’m going to help my brother get a job.
2) Create my personal website.
3) Start a website to make money on the side.
4) Make sure my family is very happy!

david
david
3 years 6 months ago
1. Your message has remained consistent since I check out your site a few years ago, but you’ve gotten so much more refined at what you’re doing. 2.Dating. Haven’t gone on a date in several years. Part of it is because I moved four times and don’t have financial stability yet. I keep telling myself that I’ll date once I ‘get this job’, or get to “x thousand per month in income’, then when I try to make that happen and it doesn’t work, it’s frustrating. I really don’t want to settle for people who are just talking to me.… Read more »
Bukka
3 years 6 months ago

Yes, very interesting.

I want to take control of my social skills and networking skills.

I’ve given up control of my business and left it to chance blaming my lack of business on not knowing the right people and not being able to connect with the right people.

The only thing that surprised me is that I’m not doing this. I used to, but I think I’ve become tired and beat up. Now I’m tired of being tired and ready to get back to work.

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